Should I text him or wait to hear from him?

Old 07-06-2018, 02:09 PM
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That's very true.

In the meantime, I hope you read some of those stickies and look around the forum, the alcoholism and newcomers forums in particular.

If not for yourself, then for your friend. Knowledge is power as they say.
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Old 07-06-2018, 02:21 PM
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Originally Posted by trailmix View Post
That's very true.

In the meantime, I hope you read some of those stickies and look around the forum, the alcoholism and newcomers forums in particular.

If not for yourself, then for your friend. Knowledge is power as they say.
Yeh will do have looked at some. The in-between place in particular is very appropriate
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Old 07-06-2018, 05:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Glenjo99 View Post
Sad thing is you can get the best advice in the world from lots of lovely people, but at the end of the day all you want is to text your mate and say I miss you, I care about you, and I support you. For today I'll resist.
Believe me, I know this hurts. I know how very much this hurts. I miss my friends, too. It is painful to be shut out of the life of someone you care for very much. But it does happen--for a variety of reasons. I will probably never know those reasons, either.

Acceptance really is the only way forward. As much as I would like to argue against the silence, I can't. As much as I would like to know the "why's", I won't. I have to accept that, cry, pick myself back up and move forward.

And I pray--every day--that my friends are OK. That they are happy or at least working toward happy. That they are surrounded by supportive and loving people who bring joy to their world. And I have not prayed to be one of those people, because then my prayer becomes about me--and it isn't about me. It's about them and their ultimate well-being.

And yes, it hurts, and I am sad, too. I hope that you have a peaceful evening and that tomorrow dawns just a bit brighter.
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Old 07-07-2018, 02:37 PM
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Originally Posted by Seren View Post

And I pray--every day--that my friends are OK. That they are happy or at least working toward happy. That they are surrounded by supportive and loving people who bring joy to their world. And I have not prayed to be one of those people, because then my prayer becomes about me--and it isn't about me. It's about them and their ultimate well-being.
^^^^ This and it took me one hell of a long time to get to this place. I used to pray that, "God would bring him whatever would benefit him." With time, I realized I was not a benefit to him at all. This was hard to swallow and very humbling.

Over time I realized that it didn't matter how smart/pretty/kind/caring I was. What really mattered is that we both live our lives the best we could each with our own burden of wounds and challenges. His wounds and challenges were none of my business.

And it hurt beyond hurt beyond hurt.

Please be kind to yourself Glenjo as what you are going through is no joke. There really should be some kind of spa/rehab/camp for us while we go through the crippling pain of walking away (or being shoved away) from the addict alcoholic.
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Old 07-08-2018, 03:06 AM
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Originally Posted by Bekindalways View Post
^^^^ This and it took me one hell of a long time to get to this place. I used to pray that, "God would bring him whatever would benefit him." With time, I realized I was not a benefit to him at all. This was hard to swallow and very humbling.

Over time I realized that it didn't matter how smart/pretty/kind/caring I was. What really mattered is that we both live our lives the best we could each with our own burden of wounds and challenges. His wounds and challenges were none of my business.

And it hurt beyond hurt beyond hurt.

Please be kind to yourself Glenjo as what you are going through is no joke. There really should be some kind of spa/rehab/camp for us while we go through the crippling pain of walking away (or being shoved away) from the addict alcoholic.
You've hit the nail on the head. Hurt beyond hurt beyond hurt.
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Old 07-08-2018, 02:47 PM
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When I look back what I regret is the lost time I spent consumed with a self-destructive relationship. There was no joy, only misery.
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