Need a laugh??
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 151
Need a laugh??
In some other threads, I've written about my AW's complicated detox. She is still in CCU, but physically improving. Mentally, however, she slips into "delusions/fantasy" -- which is concerning, but some of them are down right inventive/funny.
Yesterday, for example, she told me that they came in to the hospital and rounded up people, including her, and took them "up to bear country" where they made them "pee in a hole." Bear country?? I don't think I've heard AW use that term in 17 years of marriage. "Pee in a hole" ummmm....ok.
And, then she'll say: "I know it sounds crazy, but it's true." Well, if it's true Stephen King's imagination ain't chit.
I also have 5 women I'm keeping on the side. Sure, besides being the only person working right now (and earning money to pay the bills, well maybe) and taking care of our two kids, keeping the house somewhat clean, doing laundry and running up to the hospital, I've got plenty of time to keep 5 women entertained with my fat, middle aged tale of woe. I'm soooommmmeeee body's idea of a dream boat I'm sure.
My ex-wife (no kids with her) who lives in a different city five hours away came to our house and ordered pizzas and vodka from my daughter.
She was "asleep on the beach." Jeez, I'd like to take a "Total Recall"-like vacation too. I don't really even need to GO to the beach - would like to think that I was "asleep on the beach" one time.
Now, I'm told that most of yesterday she was coherent, etc. And she's still on sedation. And her liver kidneys while functioning aren't firing on all cylinders -- so maybe some or all of this is the drugs (knock on wood).
But, I had to laugh at how detailed these delusions and fantasies were.
MCESaint
Yesterday, for example, she told me that they came in to the hospital and rounded up people, including her, and took them "up to bear country" where they made them "pee in a hole." Bear country?? I don't think I've heard AW use that term in 17 years of marriage. "Pee in a hole" ummmm....ok.
And, then she'll say: "I know it sounds crazy, but it's true." Well, if it's true Stephen King's imagination ain't chit.
I also have 5 women I'm keeping on the side. Sure, besides being the only person working right now (and earning money to pay the bills, well maybe) and taking care of our two kids, keeping the house somewhat clean, doing laundry and running up to the hospital, I've got plenty of time to keep 5 women entertained with my fat, middle aged tale of woe. I'm soooommmmeeee body's idea of a dream boat I'm sure.
My ex-wife (no kids with her) who lives in a different city five hours away came to our house and ordered pizzas and vodka from my daughter.
She was "asleep on the beach." Jeez, I'd like to take a "Total Recall"-like vacation too. I don't really even need to GO to the beach - would like to think that I was "asleep on the beach" one time.
Now, I'm told that most of yesterday she was coherent, etc. And she's still on sedation. And her liver kidneys while functioning aren't firing on all cylinders -- so maybe some or all of this is the drugs (knock on wood).
But, I had to laugh at how detailed these delusions and fantasies were.
MCESaint
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 844
I can understand the 5 ladies as haa sometimes women do have a jealous streak, but being taken out to Bear Country and Peeing in a Hole? Made me laugh so hard. And I know its not funny with the serious condition she's in. Im keeping your family in my thoughts and I truly hope bears turn into bunnies.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
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So glad to hear that God/Yahweh/Allah/whatever has gifted MCE with a sense of humor.
So much of all this isn't funny but if you can laugh at some of the craziness more power to you.
MCE may every angel in the universe dive bomb you and your family.
So much of all this isn't funny but if you can laugh at some of the craziness more power to you.
MCE may every angel in the universe dive bomb you and your family.
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 497
Yes, yes, and yes.
During the first hospitalization of my stepson, he had quite a few delusions. Old episodes of "In Living Color" were playing on the walls of the hospital room, nurses lived in a dormitory on his floor, his brothers were pod people. I might have found some of it vaguely amusing if it weren't for the fact that he had to have a couple of liters of ascites drained from his abdomen and he was only given a 50/50 shot to make it through. I'm sorry about this self-inflicted nightmare your wife is experiencing. I hope that she will recover and that this will be what she needs to finally decide to quit. Three hospitalizations have not been enough for my stepson.
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: St. Louis, MO
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It's one of the major "coping" skills that I (and I think all or most of my siblings) developed growing up.
Plus, I dunno . . . something about the phrase "bear country" which sounds like something Jeremiah Johnson would've said in the 1850s roaming around the Rocky Mountains in a blizzard that is so "out of character" coming out of my suburban mom AW's mouth in 2018 - just makes me crack-up - like an actor that just "cracks-up" filming a scene in a movie and they just can't get their lines out. My eldest daughter and I have decided to make a "code phrase" between us when AW (or anyone else) is less than rational . . . those people?? Well, they're in "bear country." (i.e., crazy town).
The update from AW is:
1. I have another child, a boy, named Steve or Steven (um, no - only have had two children with AW; but if I did have another child then *oy* the back child support would kill me!!).
MCESaint
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
Yesterday, for example, she told me that they came in to the hospital and rounded up people, including her, and took them "up to bear country" where they made them "pee in a hole." Bear country?? I don't think I've heard AW use that term in 17 years of marriage. "Pee in a hole" ummmm....ok.
And, then she'll say: "I know it sounds crazy, but it's true." Well, if it's true Stephen King's imagination ain't chit.
Is your son's last name King by chance?
And, then she'll say: "I know it sounds crazy, but it's true." Well, if it's true Stephen King's imagination ain't chit.
Is your son's last name King by chance?
It's always great to be able to laugh and find humor in our situations.
Wrap up a roll of toilet paper and bring it to her for her next trip!! Then open your little black book and explain to her that you need to organize all your dates with the 5 woman so they don't overlap. And then say good bye dear I have a lunch date with the new son. lol
Wrap up a roll of toilet paper and bring it to her for her next trip!! Then open your little black book and explain to her that you need to organize all your dates with the 5 woman so they don't overlap. And then say good bye dear I have a lunch date with the new son. lol
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 224
MCE ... I am totaling stealing "bear country" as my new code word. Might even find a way to start using "Go pee in a hole" as some sort of sarcastic diss ... I mean, who will have a comeback for that one?! Sending you and your daughters (Maybe even Steve) my best wishes during this bear country time.
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 844
Sometimes you just have to laugh otherwise you will cry.
This is a really hard thing to deal with MCESaint and I know it must be invoking all of your coping skills to deal with her medical issues, these delusions, work and your kids.
Now back to the bunnies. Ladies.. how did my cute bunnies playing in a green meadow with sun rays coming down move over to the Playboy mansion?? HAAAAA
This is a really hard thing to deal with MCESaint and I know it must be invoking all of your coping skills to deal with her medical issues, these delusions, work and your kids.
Now back to the bunnies. Ladies.. how did my cute bunnies playing in a green meadow with sun rays coming down move over to the Playboy mansion?? HAAAAA
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 151
Sometimes you just have to laugh otherwise you will cry.
This is a really hard thing to deal with MCESaint and I know it must be invoking all of your coping skills to deal with her medical issues, these delusions, work and your kids.
Now back to the bunnies. Ladies.. how did my cute bunnies playing in a green meadow with sun rays coming down move over to the Playboy mansion?? HAAAAA
This is a really hard thing to deal with MCESaint and I know it must be invoking all of your coping skills to deal with her medical issues, these delusions, work and your kids.
Now back to the bunnies. Ladies.. how did my cute bunnies playing in a green meadow with sun rays coming down move over to the Playboy mansion?? HAAAAA
MCESaint
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 8,984
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That's wild! I've been 'out there' the past few days,but not booze related. I got very angry at some merchandise at one of my businesses the other night and said some other off the wall stuff. I should have stayed home! But, some of my buddy's got a kick outta it.
Congrats on the new son btw!
Congrats on the new son btw!
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