This Hurts and now I知 Drinking
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Join Date: Feb 2018
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This Hurts and now I知 Drinking
To kill the pain. Aside from two days when I had to work and go into the office I知 home starting to drink from the afternoon thru late in the night for the last five nights straight. I invested too much in someone I cared for who has this disease and now I知 paying for it as well.
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,792
Dear London
When my ex and I were still together, I drank a 6 pack every work night. On days off, only God knows how much. My liver enzymes were messed up, I had violent stomach cramps, and periods of time I couldn't remember.
My last drink was almost 4 years ago when we separated.
You are merely anesthetizing yourself. If you do a little work, one day at a time, you can relieve the root issues that cause you to drink.
We are here to help you!
When my ex and I were still together, I drank a 6 pack every work night. On days off, only God knows how much. My liver enzymes were messed up, I had violent stomach cramps, and periods of time I couldn't remember.
My last drink was almost 4 years ago when we separated.
You are merely anesthetizing yourself. If you do a little work, one day at a time, you can relieve the root issues that cause you to drink.
We are here to help you!
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by London393 
To kill the pain. Aside from two days when I had to work and go into the office I知 home starting to drink from the afternoon thru late in the night for the last five nights straight. I invested too much in someone I cared for who has this disease and now I知 paying for it as well.
something i didnt realize until i got sober:
if it truly killed the pain, i wouldnt have had to keep drinking.
F.E.A.R.=
**** Everything And Run
or
Face Everything And Recover
"O you must wear your rue with difference".
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 1,146
Hello London. Emotional pains exists for a reason. If you try to numb it by destroying your mind or your body, it will eventually find you anyway. Better to face it, have a good talk to it, take it out for a walk, and realize it's not as scary as you initially thought it was: probably this pain looks like a frightened baby London who needs a hug... and if you ignore baby London, it will just cry louder.
No matter what happens, life goes on. No matter what happens, everyone will have to experience loss. You might lose your childhood. You might lose the ones you love (in fact, not "might", you will... sooner or later). You might lose your job. You take nothing with you to the other side. This pain is just trying to help you prepare. This is the work of life. It's not what you have that's important. It's what you leave behind -- don't drink the opportunity away, grow stronger.
No matter what happens, life goes on. No matter what happens, everyone will have to experience loss. You might lose your childhood. You might lose the ones you love (in fact, not "might", you will... sooner or later). You might lose your job. You take nothing with you to the other side. This pain is just trying to help you prepare. This is the work of life. It's not what you have that's important. It's what you leave behind -- don't drink the opportunity away, grow stronger.
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Join Date: Feb 2018
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Trying to get myself up and out of bed to go to an Al-anon meeting. But then I know what will happen right after. I’ll stop by the liquor store and pick myself up some wine because for the rest of the day and night I’ll sit and think about it, about him.
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Chicago
Posts: 5,450
How about just one thing at a time. Get out of bed. Go to the meeting. You might well feel differently about the rest of your day after that. '
The stories we tell ourselves have tremendous power, London. Tell yourself a different one. Just for today.
The stories we tell ourselves have tremendous power, London. Tell yourself a different one. Just for today.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
London.....how about an AA meeting? Putting yourself first....Your sobriety should come before everything else...first priority.
(you can still go to an alanon meeting.....but, shouldn't you go, sober...?
when you say that you "know" you will pick up wine for the rest of the day...sounds like you have already made that decision to drink.
You can, also, make a decision not to pick up the wine and drink....
Call your sponsor.....
(you can still go to an alanon meeting.....but, shouldn't you go, sober...?
when you say that you "know" you will pick up wine for the rest of the day...sounds like you have already made that decision to drink.
You can, also, make a decision not to pick up the wine and drink....
Call your sponsor.....
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Join Date: Feb 2018
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Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
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London.....none of us want the pain of a broken relationship.....we all understand that, because most all of us have suffered that...been to hell and back because of it....
However...it cannot be used as an excuse for drinking......
Drinking will take everything else you have.....and, you still have a lot to lose....
However...it cannot be used as an excuse for drinking......
Drinking will take everything else you have.....and, you still have a lot to lose....
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 994
To kill the pain. Aside from two days when I had to work and go into the office I’m home starting to drink from the afternoon thru late in the night for the last five nights straight. I invested too much in someone I cared for who has this disease and now I’m paying for it as well.
You only have to pay as much as you will allow. You know what to do. Drinking will not make anything any better. You will just end up like your ex.
You only have to pay as much as you will allow. You know what to do. Drinking will not make anything any better. You will just end up like your ex.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,418
Originally Posted by London393
I just don稚 want to hurt so bad like this. I don稚 deserve this. I tried my best to have everything and now I have nothing.
Give yourself the same care you gave your A- the second chances, the forgiveness, the love- and please stop drinking. There is nothing good about the place alcohol will take you and it will also delay any recovery from all the emotions you must deal with to move on in your life.
So many of us have been on both sides of this same situation, and it can all be better, but not with the addition of alcohol.
Alcohol is a liar and a thief, you don't deserve THAT in your life.
Be well, be strong, I'm pulling for you.
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