new and searching
 

[email protected]

searching for support, in need of advice for coping with an alcoholic and drug addict. new to net, new to boards. desperate, scared and alone. have 2 small children who are being affected. 3 year old is the one I'm really worried about.

jml

Dear jml,
You are not alone. I am new here too, also searching for support. I just started reading "Codependent No More by Melody Beattie". It's very appropriate for me right now, and maybe it will be for you too. Right now, surround yourself with people who know you and can be of support. Take good care of yourself. I know this from life experience...you need to be there for your two small children, and you have to take care of yourself to do that. Taking care of yourself is not selfish. You are valuable. You matter. You are not alone. There are many voices here, most
have been posting for quite awhile and I'm sure they will help. Did you see the message for the meeting next Sunday? Check it out. I think it's at 8 Central, but verify this to be sure. You can do this. You can't control your alcoholic and drug addict
person. You can only control your own behavior. You are not responsible for things he says or does, or for causing his problems. God cares about you and is with you.
I know that others will respond. These are things I've learned in just the last week!

new meetings....
 

jml,
I looked it up on the posts and a new meeting begins on Sunday, Nov. 7th at 8 Eastern, (7 central time.) There was also one on Monday nights at 9 central, I think. Hope you can make it to one, or go to a meeting of AlAnon in your area. :kitty:

hey thank you!! At least you aren't like somebody on another board that told me to call cps for a restraing order. I want to save my family. i just have to get to a place in myself where i am calm and able to move forward. new to this area have no family here and do not know (really) anyone here. am usually pretty tough. will try hard to join meeting. thanks again

jml

Dear jml,

I don't know if you realize how far you've already come. You know there is a problem, you want help and you're concerned the welfare of your children. WOW!!! That's an amazing first step. Also an amazing Mom.

Find alanon meetings. Go to as many as possible. Lots of them have daycare and will let you bring your toddler Read the literature they give out at the meetings and the books they have.

Don't forget your higher power/God. He's always there for you. All you need to do is ask.

Blessings, Kathy

thanks kathy. am looking into local meetings. know how much i need them. also know that all i can do is let go and let God but right now its easier said than done. hardest part is the kids. so stressed because he disapears to do his "thing" that i'm not sleeping and am cranky. one good thing he's signed on too and went to his first meeting tonight. for me the most important thing in the world is taking care of my kids. my family.........they are my world. just feeling week.................

thanks again!!!!!!!! (all the info. on this site is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jml - sorry for the late welcome. it's great you are seeking help and support and this site has wonderful, caring folks that will support you and share their wisdom with you.

good luck to you and many hugs - it's a difficult journey but at least we don't have to walk alone!

hugs - cwohio