More stress today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: east coast
Posts: 526
More stress today
I really am trying to stay upbeat. I have a lot to be thankful for.
I was hit with another emotional tidal wave today.
After being gone for over 17 months, my XAH was ordered by the court to put our house on the market! Finally!!
So today the realtor emailed me pictures of the house for approval- inside and out. I wasn't expecting that- although I should have expected it.
I haven't looked inside that house since May 2016.
The house is beautiful. Well decorated, comfortable, up-to-date.
I am feeling numb.
I miss living there.
I have made my tiny apartment into a nice home.
I am going house hunting with a realtor tomorrow.
I know I can decorate a home just for myself and it will be beautiful.
And after all it is only a house. But it was home for me for 19 years.
I do not want to sound... like I can't move on from this because I can.
And it is a step in the process of rebuilding my life.
But I really wish I had not looked at the pictures.
I have to look forward, not backward. It's too large for just me- then there are the memories, some good, some not so good. But I need to make a fresh start.
I was hit with another emotional tidal wave today.
After being gone for over 17 months, my XAH was ordered by the court to put our house on the market! Finally!!
So today the realtor emailed me pictures of the house for approval- inside and out. I wasn't expecting that- although I should have expected it.
I haven't looked inside that house since May 2016.
The house is beautiful. Well decorated, comfortable, up-to-date.
I am feeling numb.
I miss living there.
I have made my tiny apartment into a nice home.
I am going house hunting with a realtor tomorrow.
I know I can decorate a home just for myself and it will be beautiful.
And after all it is only a house. But it was home for me for 19 years.
I do not want to sound... like I can't move on from this because I can.
And it is a step in the process of rebuilding my life.
But I really wish I had not looked at the pictures.
I have to look forward, not backward. It's too large for just me- then there are the memories, some good, some not so good. But I need to make a fresh start.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
I get it...how the heartstrings can be pulled by connections to a house/home that we have lived in and invested parts of ourself into...
I can remember sobbing as I said "goodby" to my flower beds...even when I was making a happy type of move.....
Our home/nest just gets woven into the emotional tapestry of our lives...
Thank God, that we humans have an internal force to go forward and are amazingly adaptive.....We do get invested into the new home, also, given enough time...
Like the saying..."It is o.k. to look back...just don't stare"
It m ight help to look for some unique feature of the new house that you might have wanted, but never had...like a sunroom, or a walk in kitchen pantry....or a cute garden wall,,,,,,,or a skylight.......
It, also, helped me to take some token along, from the old place....like digging up a shrub or some perennial plants...and some seeds from the flowers and sproutings from a favorite tree.....
I can remember sobbing as I said "goodby" to my flower beds...even when I was making a happy type of move.....
Our home/nest just gets woven into the emotional tapestry of our lives...
Thank God, that we humans have an internal force to go forward and are amazingly adaptive.....We do get invested into the new home, also, given enough time...
Like the saying..."It is o.k. to look back...just don't stare"
It m ight help to look for some unique feature of the new house that you might have wanted, but never had...like a sunroom, or a walk in kitchen pantry....or a cute garden wall,,,,,,,or a skylight.......
It, also, helped me to take some token along, from the old place....like digging up a shrub or some perennial plants...and some seeds from the flowers and sproutings from a favorite tree.....
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 2,792
Qtpi,
We understand it's not just the house, its the complete closure of everything.
You look at those pix, and there are a lot of sad times also in that home, that's why you left 17 months ago. If only those walls could talk and remind you of that. It was beautiful decorated but there is a lot of dark moment for you there.
It is time to move on, you will find your own new home. I love my new little home, with my furniture and decorating. I make it the way I want it, it's all mine. It will be a safe home and no hurt there. Take this sad closure and make it happy for a new beginning. You have been very patient to get to this point. Big hugs my friend, as today is a brighter day.
We understand it's not just the house, its the complete closure of everything.
You look at those pix, and there are a lot of sad times also in that home, that's why you left 17 months ago. If only those walls could talk and remind you of that. It was beautiful decorated but there is a lot of dark moment for you there.
It is time to move on, you will find your own new home. I love my new little home, with my furniture and decorating. I make it the way I want it, it's all mine. It will be a safe home and no hurt there. Take this sad closure and make it happy for a new beginning. You have been very patient to get to this point. Big hugs my friend, as today is a brighter day.
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