JessicaNAJ

I went back and read my posts and thank you soooo very much for suggesting I do that. His not drinking is slowly pulling the wool back over my eyes and I began to forget what things are really like.

It has been two weeks since his last drink. He's playing games with my head again. Has me thinking he's getting better (probably because he thinks he better). And I've been caving ... wanting that "normal" life back (I've been craving that). He has been super super nice, even bought us a TV today (our other one died) and helping me when he sees me getting stressed/overwhelmed. But, the reality of all this is, he has NOT gone to AA. He is NOT getting help for his alcoholism. It's only a matter of time before he drinks again.

I'm turning my focus off of him (which is where I let myself slip into AGAIN).

I'm putting my focus back on my kids and ME!

Thank you for my lightbulb moment.

Cadence57

Hi Jessica,
I'm in the same place as you (sorta). My A quit too (or so he says) but he won't go to AA and that is a stipulation of my moving out to where he is... You're right - even though he might not be drinking, statistcally his chances of staying sober are slim without a support system (AA).

gelfling

Hugs, Kathy

Gracey

That is a wonderful thing, keep being strong and keep your focus on you and your kids......

Lorelai

Please enjoy the time you have right now - today. Try not to worry about what is going to happen in the future. Keep your boundaries in place and continue to work on you and enjoy your life.

You'll be a stronger, happier person either way - whether he drinks again or stays sober.

It's tough to do but does get easier and easier with practice.
Hugs - L

Disappointed

My AH is doing the exact same thing. He hasn't stopped at a bar for a week. The past two weekends he was in a really good mood, kind of scary... This weekend he took me to an event and didn't complain.. Today it's hard to tell what will happen... But I am not going to waste valuable time thinking about it. What is really sad we have had two good weekends together and all I can think of is all the bad weekends, weeks, days & hours over the past 25 years. Why can't we have good times all the time???

Cadence57

Disappointed,
I think that once the good times become "normal" it may be easier to let go of all the bad times. They'll always be there but hopefully to serve as a warning - lessons learned and growth experienced... a measuring stick of sorts to reflect on "how far we've come"
In the meantime, keep enjoying the gift of your A's sobriety - "one day at a time".