chrisea

I should have my head examined. Here I am sitting and not doing much of anything, but working my ass off (sometimes 60 to 80 a week) and the guy that lives here... is out drinking. I have been sleeping on a makeshift cot in the livingroom for months??? I go to call the store, no answer, call his cell phone (somehow it got turned back on). He should learn, that when you go to turn the cricket nokia phone off, the caller can here what you are saying... Well he said "and I definetly don't like her" (while he was saying this...like he was talking to someone + I could here the sounds of a bar) and everything went dead. I tried to call back and just got his voice mail.

Now for the part that I made a Big Mess out of my life. I tried to help him restart his business. He is using my name and causing lots of bills in my name. Of course he says he is truly interested in making this business work, but from my point of view, then why is he sitting on a bar stool, wasting money that could go to help pay for the rent, utilities, just about everything. I know that the rug could be pulled out from him, by me.... he has bad credit, (now I'm on the verge of having bad credit), the store wouldn't have a credit card machine, alot of the business bills are unpaid, but this will also reflect on me........... I'm about sick... It's been 2 yrs since he reopened, and I've been helping out, plus paying all the bills to keep me in my apt. Part of me is very scared... :titanic chrisea

brightlight

I do not know what to tell you about the money, but I think the only fun these guys have at the bar is listening to the phone calls from the wives or watching what happens with the wife comes to the bar. My husband must have held the phone up or made some remark when I called him and I heard this guy saying just hang up. Then I heard him saying bi**h, bi**h, bi**h. Husband has been good for two days, but is back at the bar tonight with a promise to me, our kids, and himself that he would only drink one pitcher and be back home. We are eating and he is not here. I have some money coming in a will in a few months and if he is still drinking it is going somewhere that he cannot touch it. He thinks I am just yaking, but he will not touch it. We will see how funny it is then. LOL

JT

chrisea,

You have NOT made a big mess out of your life! Your life is not over. When I lost it and went to Alanon I didn't know I had choices. I thought I had made my bed, so to speak. I was wrong. All it takes is one person to start "getting it" and it all starts to change. You can stay, you can go, you can stay and separate finances, you can go and sue him for what he owes you...the whole world is open when you realize that you have choices. AND that you owe it to yourself to do what is right for you.

Hugs,
JT

SJW

Chrisea, JT is SO right! Even if you still believe that you have made mistakes about your relationship, you STILL get to make choices about what you do with your future. YOU get to decide what you want to do. You deserve to be happy, and you can make choices that will help that happen. No one else controls your happiness because it's INSIDE of you! Choose happiness!

SJW

chrisea

thank you for your replies. Today I went with my sister, who knows Nothing about the situation I'm in (she would probably try to knock some sense in me or something...) anyways spent all day with her (I haven't spent time with her like this in yrs and besides next week I get one day off. This is my first complete weekend off since Feb 2003. I got back just a little over 10pm and he doesn't appear like he was even here all day. So He's back at it again, when there is no money and he owes alot. But that upsets me, because I'm involved in that, Ugggrrrr.... If he could support all this, and I wasn't involved, I would care that he is ruining his Health (but it is His health) but other wise go for it.... So I have no idea where this is going but I'm disgusted about the whole thing. Chrisea

Blondie

Just a thought, but did you ever consider consulting an attorney to try to keep this man from using your name? It is a big mess and you may need a professional to help you get out of it before it gets any bigger. It all sounds so very, very frustrating!