dandylion

PleantyGood.....I'm glad to hear that you have such good resources to rely on if things get dicey.....and US, also...(wink).....
I am wishing the very best for your sister....surely, in a long rehab, like this one, they will delve into the effects of the "big trauma" with her.....

PlentyGood

Thank you refiner. I'm not sure if she has NPD but she definitely has never been a person to stop to think about others. Some of her traits were admirable -- if she didn't want to go somewhere or do something she wouldn't and had no sense of obligation or guilt. I said yes to a lot when I really meant no -- codependency 101. I am better at saying no. On the other hand she has no sense of obligation or healthy guilt if she treats someone badly --example: paying back loans and such.

I think she has made such a mess of her life and is so self-centered that she doesn't have to wherewithal to think about the practical things in life and basic decency towards others. She is a ball of anxiety. She is in constant inner turmoil. She is always thinking about herself and her problems and her thoughts and her flaws. There is no room for anything else. She's a severely wounded child living in an adult body.

Ladybird579

This thread has reminded me of when my exah was in early rehab his first time of many. I had no idea he was there but he phoned me with a shipping order of things he expected me to send him or take. One item was a very expensive electric powered wheelchair. Where he imagined I had the money for one I'll never know. Clothing, shaving gear, 400 cigarettes ( as he said that I heard a member of staff in the background saying he wasn't allowed them) a leather belt..must be black, trainers of a certain brand, socks with non slip bottoms, an i pod with his music downloaded on it from his computer at home, fizzy drinks of a certain type ... The list was endless until I managed to interrrupt with you are kidding me? I never bought or took him anything but he truly expected even tho we were divorced I would.

PlentyGood

Good for your Ladybird. Another letter arrived at my mother's with more requests for items -- baby powder and playing cards and cereal and Cokes and cigarettes, and more clothing requests and microwaveable food and on and on. It's funny and sad. We have decided not to send the majority of what she is requesting.

aasharon90

At the rehab i was in for 28 days, we had
full meals, breakfast, lunch and supper all
at the same time each day. I'm guessing there
were snacks for us, but don't remember.

We had a popcorn maker that was cool
and maybe vending machines. Washer
and dryer. Little kitchen with sink and
refrigerator.

I had my clothes delivered to me because
family did an intervention on me and the
officers delivered me to the hospital the
first evening for evaluation with just the clothes
on my back, thinking i was returning back
home later that night.

Once they gave me a good mental
evaluation, they told me i had a drinking
problem and an addiction to alcohol
and would need to stay to learn about
it and be taught a new way to live life
addiction free.

Where i was i had to remember i wasn't
on vacation and that i needed to do the
work if i want to get better and as much
as i hated being away from home, i did
what i needed to do before released.

People came and went, graduated
and moved on just as i did. Going thru
rehab wasn't a piece of cake or a walk
in the park but was necessary if i wanted
to live and go home.

Because my family did this intervention
on me, i held a resentment towards them
for a good while and didn't want hardly
any communication from them, until in
time I realized what they did was to save
save my life out of love care and concern.

I know that today and I'm grateful
for what happened to me 26 yrs ago
and use that experience to my own
benefit to help me remain sober and
grateful each day forward.

This is my recovery journey and to
this day don't depend on my family
for anything.

hopeful4

My thought, NO is a complete sentence.

There is a group of women who sometimes come to the CR I attended. It is womens only treatment center. They were always dressed up and clearly looking to attract men. Definitely happens.