What works when the sober partner uses cannabis
Ca**ie
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by OpheliaKatz 
He relapsed into an affair. He was after the "high" you get when a relationship is new. So basically he's not "in recovery" yet or taking responsibility for the problems that led him to addiction. Your daughters pot use was an excuse for him to leave her and their child. However, I also think that using pot around an addict is not... great... because if it does trigger their addiction.... Your daughter is blessed to have you in her life to help her. All the best with moving forward. :-)
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
im truly sorry to read whats happening for your daughter and her chitlin.
in all honesty, when i read,"He is also spending a lot of time with a young woman from AA" i had a feeling all the "reasons' were lies and a LOT of the "suggestions" from members of AA were lies,too.
and the members of AA probably havent been given the full story.
onto what is on my mind:
this isnt the first time its happened in AA- 2 sickies dont make a wellie.
and when the sh*t hits the fan and reality hits........
sometimes the they ( thinkin of husband here)come back begging forgiveness.
its not good to future trip, but might be something to think about occurring.
in all honesty, when i read,"He is also spending a lot of time with a young woman from AA" i had a feeling all the "reasons' were lies and a LOT of the "suggestions" from members of AA were lies,too.
and the members of AA probably havent been given the full story.
onto what is on my mind:
this isnt the first time its happened in AA- 2 sickies dont make a wellie.
and when the sh*t hits the fan and reality hits........
sometimes the they ( thinkin of husband here)come back begging forgiveness.
its not good to future trip, but might be something to think about occurring.
Ca**ie
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by LexieCat
Has she consulted a lawyer yet?
Ca**ie
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by tomsteve
im truly sorry to read whats happening for your daughter and her chitlin.
in all honesty, when i read,"He is also spending a lot of time with a young woman from AA" i had a feeling all the "reasons' were lies and a LOT of the "suggestions" from members of AA were lies,too.
and the members of AA probably havent been given the full story.
onto what is on my mind:
this isnt the first time its happened in AA- 2 sickies dont make a wellie.
and when the sh*t hits the fan and reality hits........
sometimes the they ( thinkin of husband here)come back begging forgiveness.
its not good to future trip, but might be something to think about occurring.
in all honesty, when i read,"He is also spending a lot of time with a young woman from AA" i had a feeling all the "reasons' were lies and a LOT of the "suggestions" from members of AA were lies,too.
and the members of AA probably havent been given the full story.
onto what is on my mind:
this isnt the first time its happened in AA- 2 sickies dont make a wellie.
and when the sh*t hits the fan and reality hits........
sometimes the they ( thinkin of husband here)come back begging forgiveness.
its not good to future trip, but might be something to think about occurring.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Talking to a lawyer doesn't mean she has to DO anything right now. It's more to find out her rights/responsibilities. Most places, child support guidelines are a starting point. When one parent is disabled, that might factor into the mix. Guidelines generally presume that both parents have an income (or are capable of earning one).
Many lawyers offer a free or low-cost initial consult. There are also legal services programs that might be free for her. The other issue is a custody/visitation order. Without that, as the child's father, he might have the right to pick the child up from school and not return him, for example. It's just important to know the law so she can protect herself and her child.
It's great that he's giving her money now, but without an order, there's nothing in place if he decides to stop.
Many lawyers offer a free or low-cost initial consult. There are also legal services programs that might be free for her. The other issue is a custody/visitation order. Without that, as the child's father, he might have the right to pick the child up from school and not return him, for example. It's just important to know the law so she can protect herself and her child.
It's great that he's giving her money now, but without an order, there's nothing in place if he decides to stop.
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