tomsteve

nothin wrong with havin hope, but havin hope becajse someone is thinking about getting belp- i dont know about that.
im thinkin about makin some dinner. can hope all i want , but until i get off my ass and get into action im gonna be hungry and that hope is useless

aliciagr

Seeker,

Im sorry I think I must have misunderstood your post. I thought your ex had stopped drinking, but I guess he is still hard at it, and not recognizing any problem. Sorry about that.

Seeker21

Well, I wouldn't say "hard at it". I think he's cut back, but I don't think he's stopped. I didn't ask that when we talked. And he knows he has a problem.

But I think your reply was relevant anyway because he is seeing a therapist and trying to work on his issues, like your husband. As far as I know, he has no imminent plans to stop drinking all together. And as LexieCat pointed out, I think he feels this is a drastic measure at this point, especially since his life is "better" right now. As yes, I still think a large part of him thinks he can control it. He has not admitted his powerless yet.

They always say the first step is admitting you have a problem. As you all have pointed out, there can be a long time in between that and the real first step, which is admitting you are powerless over alcohol and your life has become unmanageable. I hate to say it this way, but unfortunately his life seems currently manageable, so I don't have high hopes that he'll seek recovery any time soon. He has no reason to.