New And Need Help!

Old 02-07-2002, 07:39 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Peoria, IL USA
Posts: 105

Your last post really hit me hard. Not wanting to get close cause they smell like a skid row bum, yuck. I remember all too well. For years living like that without human contact except hugs from the kids. I built up such a big wall around myself sometimes I feel like I will never be able to be close to a man again. But I am hoping on learning next how to break down this wall and be whole. I know it is like eveything else, One Day At A Time, but I will never give up hope. At least that side of the bed doesn't stink now.
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Old 02-08-2002, 05:20 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Sally's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 140

Dear Lisa

What I mean by separating mentaly, is stop reacting to his actions, start slowly and ever so small. Just focuse on your own thought's and needs,However small they are.

Take out a picture of yourself when you were a little girl. Look at that girl, remember ,who was she, what made her smile, was she funny? what did she like to do? Did she have friends? discover her again..Take care of that little girl. Your still her... Now take a good long look in the mirror... study yourself.....what makes you smile.....what is good about you....what's special about you.? Have you loved yourself? Have you treated yourself well, Discover yourself again....figure out what your needs this moment... it can be as simple as... I need 10 minutes to myself....light a candle... have a bath....
go to the a spirtual book... be with you.....No one can take care of you, but you, because only you know what you need.
And you are amazing.............

either you'll thinK Iam the weirdest person on earth for writing this... but that is truly what helped me...It helps to GET YOU grounded, and solid, when you really know who you are.
No one can take the journey for you...unfortunatly...and there is no easy fix.. it's a slow process, but it is a healing process, and your already on your way.
Go girl........find that strength within.. and kick are amazing.......You know you are.....!

regards Sally
( check out my posting called SOMETHING TO SHARE. it's posted on this alanon board....
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