I think this pretty well sums up recovery for me:

Old 02-01-2017, 09:16 AM
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I think this pretty well sums up recovery for me:





Yep.
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Old 02-01-2017, 09:41 AM
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Where is the LOVE button!!!!
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Old 02-01-2017, 09:42 AM
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Thank you for this post!! You have no idea how badly I needed to read this today.
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Old 02-01-2017, 09:49 AM
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I love it!! That's great!! and oh so true.....
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Old 02-01-2017, 09:50 AM
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Flame on, my fiery friend--great, great post!
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Old 02-01-2017, 10:09 AM
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My sentiments exactly! Thank you for posting that.
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Old 02-01-2017, 11:22 AM
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Amen.
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Old 02-01-2017, 11:43 AM
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fireSprite.....I have read, somewhere, that this is taken from the work of some psychologist (can't remember the name), who said that this is an indication of healthy self esteem....
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Old 02-01-2017, 11:58 AM
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This so describes my toxic work environment right now. A little office full of sick, miserable, unhappy people with psycho owners and I have spent most of my tenure here (10 months) being the "nice one." Now that I am not playing the doormat role, the knives have come out. I need to leave, but I like the money and the flexibility. Does this sound familiar, my codie friends??? Ugh, will I ever learn?!?
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Old 02-01-2017, 04:56 PM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
This so describes my toxic work environment right now. A little office full of sick, miserable, unhappy people with psycho owners and I have spent most of my tenure here (10 months) being the "nice one." Now that I am not playing the doormat role, the knives have come out. I need to leave, but I like the money and the flexibility. Does this sound familiar, my codie friends??? Ugh, will I ever learn?!?
I was thinking that recovery is working if you have figured this out in only 10 months, and stopped being the doormat!
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Old 02-01-2017, 06:12 PM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
I need to leave, but I like the money and the flexibility. Does this sound familiar, my codie friends??? Ugh, will I ever learn?!?
I dunno how "codie" it is to hesitate to give up two things you value--money and flexibility. It all depends on your personal priorities. Lots of people work at sucky jobs for similar reasons (though the source of the suckage might vary). If your life outside of work is satisfying then sometimes it's possible to detach from workplace toxicity, too.
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Old 02-02-2017, 01:28 AM
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This is so perfect right now. I have been having this thought so much lateley.
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Old 02-02-2017, 02:34 AM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
I need to leave, but I like the money and the flexibility. Does this sound familiar, my codie friends??? Ugh, will I ever learn?!?
Hey as long as you're clear about why you stay. My boss pretty much went insane before Christmas (basically a nice guy, but out of control) and I just sucked it up because I know what I'm getting from the deal.
(my mantra is 'RDO...RDO...RDO').
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Old 02-02-2017, 06:51 AM
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Great post

Taking it further:


Now I walk into a room full of people and could care less whether I like them or not.

I work to take choose my likes or dislikes based on their actions. If you improve my life - here is a like for you. If you bother me I remove myself from your vicinity.
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Old 02-02-2017, 07:33 AM
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Originally Posted by dandylion
fireSprite.....I have read, somewhere, that this is taken from the work of some psychologist (can't remember the name), who said that this is an indication of healthy self esteem....
Who, me? Confident? Yeah, I might've been accused of this a time or 2..... this week.... lol. I'm kidding, in all seriousness yes, I have definitely been noticing more externalization of my confidence in ways like this. You've intrigued me about the origin or this quote now, I think I'll dig into it when I have time, thanks!

Originally Posted by Nata1980 View Post
Taking it further:
Now I walk into a room full of people and could care less whether I like them or not.
I work to take choose my likes or dislikes based on their actions. If you improve my life - here is a like for you. If you bother me I remove myself from your vicinity.
Thank you for saying it first! I know that it can kind of come off in a condescending way IF someone chooses to interpret it that way & I'm so far from caring that people don't know what to *do* with it.

Every time I've started to question whether I'm isolating or judging, I get such unexpected validation from my HP through all kinds of signs that keep showing me that I am on the right path.

What other people think of me is none of my business, for sure. They aren't walking in my shoes.
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Old 02-02-2017, 08:39 AM
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Love this so much!
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Old 02-02-2017, 01:17 PM
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You know, as a recovering codie, I SO want my children NOT to be codependents. I'll never forget when my son was pledging a fraternity and he said to me that he started looking around the room and he said to himself, "I don't even like half these people." So, he quit. Very proud moment in this codependent mama's heart!
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Old 02-02-2017, 01:23 PM
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Yes, thanks for posting this, it's great! I feel I have some days where I feel that way, but it's also a reminder of what we should all strive for.

I can also reflect back to me feeling the other way and feeling like I needed to get everyone's approval all the time. The times I've felt the other way about it, like I'm in charge of that or that it really doesn't matter, and what really matters is my relationship with myself...It feels so awesome.
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Old 02-02-2017, 01:57 PM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
I'll never forget when my son was pledging a fraternity and he said to me that he started looking around the room and he said to himself, "I don't even like half these people." So, he quit. Very proud moment in this codependent mama's heart!
That is a great story, DoubleDragons! I'm so glad your boy had the intelligence to realize the path he was headed down was not right for him and the courage to make a change as soon as he knew that.

How different my life would have been, had I had that kind of self-knowledge and courage in years past--and how different it WILL be since I'm starting to learn those things to use NOW and in the days to come.
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Old 02-02-2017, 03:06 PM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
You know, as a recovering codie, I SO want my children NOT to be codependents. I'll never forget when my son was pledging a fraternity and he said to me that he started looking around the room and he said to himself, "I don't even like half these people." So, he quit. Very proud moment in this codependent mama's heart!
Love this.

Love the quote as well!
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