Process of self inspection, acceptance, and change

Old 03-07-2017, 12:55 AM
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Originally Posted by aliciagr View Post
I have been reading here and posting replies to some, but now Im wondering if its healthy for me? To share you have to pull from your experiences and revisit memories. We have been trying to move past it all and forward to new things. I see the benefit that sharing can give to others because there will always be someone who is just entering this arena of drugs and alcohol in their family. It helps them to see lots of perspectives, but maybe Im not noble enough to be the one to stay in the muck and lend a hand? I want to move on and be in the sun, but remain aware of the past and wise to the future. anyone experience these feelings?
Hi. Now I'm coming from the other side of the tracks. An AAer, so whether you'll find my experience helpful I don't know...
When I first got sober there were a number of painful memories that I could not voice. Not to any person, or in writing to myself. Those secret fears, thoughts and memories kept me sick. As I worked on my recovery I have got more used to those memories. They no longer have the power of me that they once had. I have moved on and am in the sun now. But you know, some days I can be a little complacent about that sunny patch. I start thinking maybe it's not sunny enough. I forget quite how cold and lonely it was before I started to recover, and then God will throw me someone I can help through my experience, strength and hope, and my gratitude and serenity are restored. Helping other people actually helps me. It keeps me in gratitude. Keeps me appreciative of those rays of sun, even when they don't seem so bright.

It's not a case of staying in the muck. And for me anyway, its nothing to do with being noble. It's a case of being willing to help others pull themselves out. You'd be surprised at what a diffrence your experience and hope can offer. And as you shine your light for others to see, it doesn't get watered down, but grows stronger. Love and fellowship are some of the most powerful things we can gift ourselves. But we can only keep them by giving them.
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