knowthetriggers

Recent conversations with not only my AH but also his new friend from his recovery center made me realize that it is time for me to take down my wall of “protection”.

I see now that I am only hurting myself because I am not protecting myself I am hiding from the truth. Every now and then I would remove a brick so I could see what was in front of me and if I liked it then I kept my peep hole open but as soon as the ugliness of my situation started to show I would quickly close it back up again.

So just a few weeks ago I packed his bag with his alcohol and a family photo, remember, I told him that this is to represent the life he is choosing and the life he is losing. This was the first time in all my years I set a boundary and I actually stuck to it and I LOVED IT!

Here recently I need to set a boundary of not discussing what my AH shares with his friend or in a meeting. I realized I have done this before and all this does is focus on HIS recovery not mine. So I quit asking and sit silent and when we talk again I will mention to him that I am glad he is opening up to his new friends but he doesn’t have to share what is discussed.

I will also remind myself that my boundaries are just lines in the sand where I can still SEE what is going on in front of me and not build that wall back up to “block my view”.

Thanks for reading
KTT

TobeC

Bravo. You seem to be in a great place. I often say within my own recovery that I need to spend more time looking through the windshield to keep moving forward but I need to check the rear view mirror from time to time for a reality check of what I left in the past. Pray for guidance everyday. My philosophy is the past can create depression, the future can create anxiety but the current moment is what is real. Be in your moment, rewind the tape when you need to for motivation and point your ship forward. God bless and God speed.

Maudcat

I like the imagery, ktt. It all sounds good. Peace.

Westexy

Brilliant.