Whyohwhy
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 27
Whyohwhy
I'm focusing on myself, my self love, my new life, my young children, my inner peace, over the past year and a half I've seriously become a new person - my inner thoughts etc.
I coparent and see and talk to my xah weekly, we get on good considering, I won't allow negative ness , I choose to be kind, forgiving and choose my battles carefully.
I put my foot down on one thing and he is so damn quick to be mean and turn it around and make out I am the problem, that iam the mean one, that I'm the unreasonable one.......Where I have bent over backwards to make this separation 'easy' for him I could have been such a bitch...But I have empathy and understanding and don't want conflict,
I'm surprised just how quick worded and ungrateful he is, after all I do to make this coparent thing flow so good.
I'm more surprised how I quickly I can revert back to old thoughts and feel so angry bitter and sad and GUILTY , I wish what he says and does doesn't effect me but unfortunately it does, I guess I'm still learning, and will still learn it just hurts
Thanks for vent x
I coparent and see and talk to my xah weekly, we get on good considering, I won't allow negative ness , I choose to be kind, forgiving and choose my battles carefully.
I put my foot down on one thing and he is so damn quick to be mean and turn it around and make out I am the problem, that iam the mean one, that I'm the unreasonable one.......Where I have bent over backwards to make this separation 'easy' for him I could have been such a bitch...But I have empathy and understanding and don't want conflict,
I'm surprised just how quick worded and ungrateful he is, after all I do to make this coparent thing flow so good.
I'm more surprised how I quickly I can revert back to old thoughts and feel so angry bitter and sad and GUILTY , I wish what he says and does doesn't effect me but unfortunately it does, I guess I'm still learning, and will still learn it just hurts
Thanks for vent x
Unfortunately, saying "no" to an active alcoholic often results in this kind of tirade. It is specifically designed to manipulate you and make you feel bad. Please don't let his efforts get under your skin. I mean, consider the source...
Hang in there! You know what is best for you and your children
Hang in there! You know what is best for you and your children
What I used to do is remind myself to consider the source. This is not a person in his right mind. He's angry and hurting, too, which doesn't make it your fault, but who else is he gonna blame? Himself? Maybe, on some level, he does, but he still has to act like it's your fault.
Keep calm, consider the source, and carry on. Sounds like you're making great progress.
Keep calm, consider the source, and carry on. Sounds like you're making great progress.
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 2,792
We understand.
I count my blessings when I am feeling like that... you are no longer married to him, you no longer live with addictive addiction in your home, your life is serene, and so on.
You are blessed there are many women and men still struggling!! Hugs my friend for a wonderful calm holiday with your kiddos!!
I count my blessings when I am feeling like that... you are no longer married to him, you no longer live with addictive addiction in your home, your life is serene, and so on.
You are blessed there are many women and men still struggling!! Hugs my friend for a wonderful calm holiday with your kiddos!!
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