Praying

In another thread Seren suggested maybe we share some ideas we've used to help during the holidays when we've felt alone.

When life turned out differently than you expected, what did you do to enjoy the holiday season?

I'll start--

I love Christmas music. I listen to it, bake, decorate, and generally "nest", loving my peaceful, calm, safe home. Being alone is different than lonely. My home is ME. The rest will come. I sometimes think of the Christmas songs (especially the lovey dovey ones) as being about my new relationship with myself.

First year- I met a couple of new friends who were going through similar circumstances, and made reasons to teach them to make peanut brittle, learn a recipe from them, etc.

Some meetup groups will have cookie exchanges, etc., which is a good way to meet people.

I hosted a "Friendsgiving", an open house for everyone to come to, with different people stopping by throughout the day.

I hosted a work party to get to know them more. Hosting things and expanding your network is a huge way to enjoy the holidays and maybe meet some closer friends.

I thought about more distant family members who I hadn't seen in a while, and I scheduled trips to go see them and catch up. Cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.

I thought of places I'd like to see and one year took a destination trip instead of doing typical holiday things. One thing I've found is that when I go places alone I meet so many interesting people. When I'm with someone I'm often focused on them and I miss out on those opportunities.

I volunteer. Nothing eliminates depression as effectively as helping others.

I think about where I'm at and what my honest goals are for the next year at this time. Where would I like to be? What would I like to change?

I create my own traditions. For me, that includes lighting balsam candles every year (the smell makes me smile just thinking of warm fires and the season). It also includes slowly building a Lego winter community by adding one new piece each year. Sounds silly, but I can remember where I was with each piece as I put them together each year and think of how far I've come. When I pull out those boxes each year I'm so proud of where I've come...and I never would have imagined it. I actually sort of ENJOY the memories of what I had, lost, and overcame.

I view NYE as a complete rebirth and a fresh start, NOT as a holiday in which I need to kiss someone at midnight. Someday the right man might be lucky enough to kiss me then, but he's sure gonna have to be pretty awesome!

That's it for now...

jojo82

I try to avoid lovey dovey christmas songs.

I try.

Zircon

Hi,
I'm just starting to think about new traditions for the holidays.
Sometimes it's hard to think beyond what you knew( feels safe).
My last Christmas was awful, spent it alone, and kinda in a limbo of sorts.
This Christmas, I'll be counting my blessings! I usually have a real tree, but decided an artificial one will be perfect. I lost all my Christmas ornaments. I can up with an idea. Since my few friends are in the same financial situation, we decided to exchange Christmas ornaments instead of gifts. Also, I've learned to make quilted ornaments. It truely will be a different Christmas.
A very peaceful one, with my close friends and family.