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I need a drink !!!!!!

Old 10-17-2016, 08:24 PM
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I need a drink !!!!!!

I never thought I would say that again. Luckily, it's late at night and I don't drive at night. I have night blindness.

Guess I should say, I need help.....

My daughter is crazy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She is divorcing her H. She filed an RO against him. She told me that he called CPS on her, then later on told me that the principal at her sons school called CPS. She made up things to me for why her H would call CPS on her for. I couldn't make out why the principal of the school called CPS for. She was crying the entire time. Couldn't understand much.

She told me that my son was coming in on Wednesday to go to court with her. I called him, and he didn't know he was going to court.

She told me that my exah was so distraught over this that he was coming to see her this weekend, and will be coming every 2 weeks. My son told me that he already knew his dad was coming in this weekend about a month ago.

My daughter just lies and lies some more.

I can't get into any of this stuff. I just want to know that the invitations were sent out for the baby shower for my son and his wife, and I can take care of the rest.

I know that this is not a usual post for here. I've been here a long time. If any newcomers are reading this, just know that we always stay around with you. That is why I love SR.

OK, so my daughter forced her H out of the house last Wednesday. That guy Dave has been in the house since then. She told me on the phone today that Dave should be "home" about 8:30.

Oh, she also had her H arrested, she told me on multiple charges. I asked her what she meant by that. She couldn't answer anything, except that he called her and that she and Dave went to Police to report that he called her.

I'm not going to defend her, not going to defend him. Personally I think both of them should not be parents.

I just want to leave all of this here, so that I can sleep tonight. I mean there are many things here that bother me, but really why the H did she have to have "Dave" move in the same night she got the RO on her H?

I'm just tired of crazy, I can't deal with this anymore. I've had it, I am done with this stuff.

amy
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Old 10-17-2016, 09:28 PM
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Amy,

really why the H did she have to have "Dave" move in the same night she got the RO on her H?
That's like asking "Why is the sky blue?" or "Why is water wet?"

The fact is is that your daughter is who she is. Just like my sister is my sister.

We can both wonder why our loved ones act the way that they do, but even if we find the reasons there's no way they'll stop unless they want to stop.

My daughter just lies and lies some more.
Oh my gosh, that's the most tiring part right? Keeping track of this lie vs. that lie and he said vs. she said. There's no point (although I succumb to the fantasy often) of catching them on their BS, because all they'll do is attack you viciously when they're faced with the truth. At least that's the way it goes with my sister.

My sister accused our nanny of teaching her how to compulsively lie (and our nanny physically abused us), and now she's leaving her cats with her! She's told me that she's had texting conversations with my mom, and believe me my 77 year old mom could not text if her life depended on it. The list goes on and on.

But I no longer try to keep track. It's funny, I re-read some of my old posts last night, and I actually forgot some of the stuff my sister pulled. Quite frankly, I was quite relieved that some of those old transgressions had dropped from my mind - less of a burden I suppose. I also remembered the time I was seriously considering hiring a PI to follow my sister and boyfriend around. Wow I was really obsessed and nuts.

So here's to being done with it and tired of crazy. What else can we do?

PS. I am drinking hot chocolate. Does that count as a drink?
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Old 10-17-2016, 10:29 PM
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Hugs to you, it must be super hard when your child is wrecking their life like this....

At times what helps me is to think that this is a learning experience/rock bottom/consequences that this person needs this very moment. And, in their twisted way, they are doing the best they can.

Take care of yourself and your precious grandchild Sounds like it has been rough for him.
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Old 10-17-2016, 10:43 PM
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Hello Amy. Im newish (to the forum, not addiction)

It sounds rather complicated but then again when its family ive never known it to be any other way. Im not sure i understand everything. You should protect yourself and see to it that your grandson is ok. As for your daughter/husband/partner (dave?) forget them !

I love SR too, you can lean on your friends here. Just dont pick up.
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Old 10-18-2016, 05:54 AM
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Dear Amy
Block your e-mail and Facebook. Change your phone number if necessary. If your grandkids need you to take them in, you will be contacted by the authorities.
Your family situation, like mine, is just too much for sane people.
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Old 10-18-2016, 08:03 PM
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I was distraught last night. Guess still there today. I don't think this is the right place to talk about these things. It's not related to alcohol, except that I felt like drinking last night. I didn't.

I went out today to buy some stronger drinks. I picked up a 6 pack of pepsi.

I learned how to deal with my ex without drinking, need to learn how to deal with my daughter without having the idea of drinking come into my head.

I made an appt with a therapist today. I did this after I looked at my phone and realized I missed a call at 6:15 am from my daughter. She left no message, and she never called me again today.

I really can't deal with her anymore.

I know I will still answer her phone calls. There are a few reasons. It's the grandchildren, it is also my son and my daughter-in-law who is pregnant, and can't deal with this stress right now.

Thank you,
amy
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Old 10-19-2016, 05:59 AM
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Dear Amy
You are most welcome to share about all this here. We understand these things.

I don't have any children. I have been told that for a mother to detach from her own child is something I cannot possibly imagine. All I can do is offer moral support.

Congratulations for not "picking up" over this latest incident. I was told by another friend in recovery that a lot of alcoholic drinking is actually done from a codependency perspective.
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Old 10-19-2016, 06:02 AM
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Hi Amy seems like a bunch of us are in the same boat.. a drink hon if I could find my bottle of morgan in the mess of a house Ed has created I would...... hugs and cookies and tissue and if nothing else this SR is our safe haven to scream and cry in.. prayers Dear Heart for so many reasons... ardy
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