Alcoholic Neighbor

Old 09-26-2016, 06:51 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Not really an update, things continue to remain the same. I've seen her half a dozen times since that report, and she's been wasted every time.

I had to call again. The other night, she was out and totally drunk, went to pick up her 1 year old from the driveway and dropped him head first onto the concrete. She grabbed him up, and scurried inside her house, just as her husband was coming home from work. A few neighbors went over to see if baby was ok (that was a HARD fall), and to let the father know what happened, and he shooed them away, not even wanting to hear it. She had answered the door and with very slurred words instructed her husband to "deal with this ****". I did see baby later, and he *seemed* ok, but holy hell. I called CPS to add to my report, and they took it as a new case, again.

I'm not convinced anything is going to change until something awful happens, but I'll keep calling. If dad hadn't have come home, I think one of us would have called 911. I was instructed to call the police if anything like this happens again, or if she is alone with the kids and drunk. I sort of laughed (nervously) and said "Well, that's all day every day. What has to happen for something to change?" no real answer to that.
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Old 09-26-2016, 06:57 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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You're doing what you can, and that's great. I hope the kids are protected before something tragic happens. But you are doing your part.

Hopefully CPS makes a surprise visit in the middle of the day--that would get the ball rolling, one would hope.
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Old 09-26-2016, 07:16 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by NYCDoglvr View Post
As a recovering alcoholic I can certainly relate how painful it is to see someone drunk, especially when you're forced to encounter them on a daily basis. I would share about it in AA or to a sponsor. If you see any abuse of the kids, or believe they're home unattended, I suggest calling social services. Other than that, it the best you can do is not speak to your neighbor, get in and out of your building as quickly as possible.
I completely agree with this. As an alcoholic, I have a couple of friends- one in particular- I am really concerned about. By proxy, I am also concerned about my boyfriend's ex-wife because her alcoholism actively affects their 14 year old daughter in significant ways.

But. I cannot effect change in anyone else. Hard when you care- or when you are a regular observer, particularly when kids are involved- but it is truly not your business. Not my circus, not my monkeys- keep my side of the road clean and pray for others- focus on my program not theirs...whatever you want to say to describe it, that's what I've gotta remember to do. As we say in AA, no one else caused it, can control it, or can cure it.

Also...and this may sound weird...but pp 417-418 of the BB apply here. "Nothing in God's world happens by mistake" - if we truly accept this, then we can perhaps look at these situations in the light that there is a reason this specific one exists. Perhaps one of the children will go up to have a huge impact in addiction recovery in some form. Perhaps both people will stop drinking and (re) build a new life in recovery. Perhaps...a tragic lesson will come from losing one of them for a reason. Whatever it is, there is a plan. Not ours to effect, in any situation in which we alcoholics know or care about others. I find some peace in that in the context of caring for others.

Prayers for this family who still suffers.
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Old 09-26-2016, 11:01 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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You are doing the right thing - and i'm sure it takes a lot of courage!

Hang in there, I'm glad you are looking out for those kids!
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