Please help! Should I call 911?
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Join Date: Jan 2015
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Please help! Should I call 911?
Am I over reacting? My abf had almost 30 days sober. Last weekend he hurt his back really bad and got oxicodone prescribed. Tonight he drank, ON TOP OF HAVING taken the prescriptions all day. Plus, he has been taking a flexoral. I called him not knowing he drank and he couldn't even carry a conversation. Which happens after he has drank enough anyway. And I really do just want to stay our of his way and not be this "rescuer"....
But that nagging feeling that he could overdose tonight? It's eating me alive :-(
What should I do?
But that nagging feeling that he could overdose tonight? It's eating me alive :-(
What should I do?
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Yeah, if he was taking the meds it might not take too much booze for him to get loopy. Calling 911 because someone "might" OD would have the ambulance crews doing nothing else.
He's playing with fire but you can't be the guard to make sure he doesn't burn the house down.
Hope you get some rest.
He's playing with fire but you can't be the guard to make sure he doesn't burn the house down.
Hope you get some rest.
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Thanx so much everyone. I woke up every hour on the dot looking at my phone. I usually turn it off and have gotten so much better at not looking at it all night.
But last night just threw me off! He hasn't answered any texts yet. I called once this morning and got no answer. I haven't decided to go over to his place and check on him. But I really want to. His roommate was not home last night. In fact, his roommate told him he has to move out if he keeps drinking. My abf was alone last night. He usually drinks alone.
The damage all of this worry is having on my nerves. Constant anxiety, headaches, lack of sleep. My health is suffering. I really do not want to sign up for this.
I managed to work out an extra 7 months on the lease with my alcoholic mom whom I live with (she recently told me to move out). God damn alcoholics. Full of drama and negativity and pain....
I reached out to my closest friends. They each have told me they will be here for me if I need them :-)
But last night just threw me off! He hasn't answered any texts yet. I called once this morning and got no answer. I haven't decided to go over to his place and check on him. But I really want to. His roommate was not home last night. In fact, his roommate told him he has to move out if he keeps drinking. My abf was alone last night. He usually drinks alone.
The damage all of this worry is having on my nerves. Constant anxiety, headaches, lack of sleep. My health is suffering. I really do not want to sign up for this.
I managed to work out an extra 7 months on the lease with my alcoholic mom whom I live with (she recently told me to move out). God damn alcoholics. Full of drama and negativity and pain....
I reached out to my closest friends. They each have told me they will be here for me if I need them :-)
Last edited by LemonGirl; 08-04-2016 at 07:52 AM. Reason: Spelling errors
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Well... he is alive. He finally just called me. And he wants me to believe he wasn't drinking. He got defensive over me texting and calling to make sure he was okay and he said he didn't understand why I flip out and worry so much. I said, "I don't know why I care so much. I'm glad you're okay. Enjoy your day." And I hung up.
Time to go run some errands. Life goes on, no matter how I feel. Which is, hurt and pissed. Round and round we go, eh guys? So glad to have SR. So glad I have my meeting tomorrow.
Time to go run some errands. Life goes on, no matter how I feel. Which is, hurt and pissed. Round and round we go, eh guys? So glad to have SR. So glad I have my meeting tomorrow.
Last edited by LemonGirl; 08-04-2016 at 09:54 AM. Reason: Spelling errors
A work in progress
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Originally Posted by LemonGirl 
I really do not want to sign up for this.
And it's getting worse, isn't it? Now we have the drugs, too. And yes, he hurt his back, but addicts will do what addicts do, and now he will have multiple substances to detox from.
Meantime, your life is in limbo and you are now experiencing your own physical consequences of dealing with him and his addictions. At what point do you save yourself?
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God damn alcoholics. Full of drama and negativity and pain....
right and yet....you just signed up for 7 more months of living with ONE known alcoholic (your mother) and remain attached to another (your ABF).
THEY are just doing what THEY do.....only one who seems to have a problem with it all is you.........
right and yet....you just signed up for 7 more months of living with ONE known alcoholic (your mother) and remain attached to another (your ABF).
THEY are just doing what THEY do.....only one who seems to have a problem with it all is you.........
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Well, the living situation I can't really remedy as I am a teacher and don't get a full paycheck until the end of September. I too will need to save up to move out. Seven months is the earliest. It is mostly just financial planning on my part as I have two daughters and am a single mom.
As for the bf, yep. He has had sobriety, then relapse, theN sobriety, then relapse.
As for the pain meds, those really were needed. He was in the ER last weekend, not drinking related (and he was so proud of that. Lol), because of some severe back spasms. It is slowly getting better. He is using a cane to walk and I have been helping with driving and little things. I still made sure to take care of myself ;-)
But yes. His drinking IS getting worse.
So, he quacks this morning with 'I didn't drink' which turned into another quack 'it was only one beer' which had now turned into something darker. He found a flask and doesnt remember drinking. That experience has happened the past 3 times he chose to drink. It seems he is having black outs practically every time he drinks now.
Still, the question for me is: do I stay or do I go? We all know his drinking is only going to get worse... we all know that the only person I have control over is me. We all know that if I left, it will have no virtual impact on him drinking because he would do it regardless and if he were truly done, he would be done.
I am positive that moving out on my own in 7 months to a very small apartment will be a good thing for me and my daughters. I am in fact looking forward to that.
As for the bf, yep. He has had sobriety, then relapse, theN sobriety, then relapse.
As for the pain meds, those really were needed. He was in the ER last weekend, not drinking related (and he was so proud of that. Lol), because of some severe back spasms. It is slowly getting better. He is using a cane to walk and I have been helping with driving and little things. I still made sure to take care of myself ;-)
But yes. His drinking IS getting worse.
So, he quacks this morning with 'I didn't drink' which turned into another quack 'it was only one beer' which had now turned into something darker. He found a flask and doesnt remember drinking. That experience has happened the past 3 times he chose to drink. It seems he is having black outs practically every time he drinks now.
Still, the question for me is: do I stay or do I go? We all know his drinking is only going to get worse... we all know that the only person I have control over is me. We all know that if I left, it will have no virtual impact on him drinking because he would do it regardless and if he were truly done, he would be done.
I am positive that moving out on my own in 7 months to a very small apartment will be a good thing for me and my daughters. I am in fact looking forward to that.
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How much real sober time has he managed, LG?
It sounds like he's relapsed so many times since last fall that he's really just actively drinking with some sober periods rather than experiencing an honest relapse of sobriety.
It sounds like he's relapsed so many times since last fall that he's really just actively drinking with some sober periods rather than experiencing an honest relapse of sobriety.
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LG, I'm glad he is alive - I know that as much as they drive us nuts we don't want them to die. I've been through that yo-yo of anxiety. I think it will be really good for you and your girls to move into your own place. As for to stay or go, I think Hopeful had a really good point - what would you tell your daughters to do? I hope you get some well deserved peace today. You've been through a lot.
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Regardless of the legitimacy of his injury, the fact is that pain meds are addictive, and he is just adding one more complication to his disease. He's not taking them as prescribed--they ALL caution about not drinking while taking them.
Oh, and "I didn't drink" isn't a quack, it's an outright lie. He's lying to you, to his roommate, and to himself. This is TYPICAL addict behavior.
So, in answer to "do I stay or do I go," I would ask WHAT would you be staying for?
Oh, and "I didn't drink" isn't a quack, it's an outright lie. He's lying to you, to his roommate, and to himself. This is TYPICAL addict behavior.
So, in answer to "do I stay or do I go," I would ask WHAT would you be staying for?
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