alwayscovering

So of course he's been kissing my butt because of what happened on Monday. I was expecting things would be fine until the weekend because he doesn't usually drink if he has to go into work the next day. (I dont remember why he was off mon and tues) So he'd be okay all week and then probably get wasted over the weekend. He came home and I did not see the dreaded black plastic bag. (I said nothing.) then I noticed he kept checking his work phone. He informed me he is on call for the next 14 days. So he'll have to be sober for at least 21 days.

He's kinda grumpy, and very emotional (his dad passed away at the end of May so I'm sure he's now dealing with stuff he's been repressing or numbing with alcohol) he's also drinking a lot of lemonade and tea which is weird because other than alcohol the only thing he drinks is water. (I'll take the lemonade over the vodka any day)

At least I'll have some peace for the next couple of weeks.

Sotiredofitall

Sure its not lemonade and tea with vodka? Just sayin....

alwayscovering

Lol yea he's opening the cans right in front of me and drinking from the can. I just figured he was replacing the alcohol with sugar and caffeine. It's odd really that he's drinking it because he hasn't drank soda/tea/coffee/etc in about 5 years.

KidsR#1

His body is craving the sugar that A's do when they stop drinking. PB and honey sandwiches help my AH when he quit. Ice cream too. The rehab place always had sweets available- Ice cream, cheesecakes, cookies etc to help with cravings.

alwayscovering

Good to know. I keep a stash of junk so I will it leave out for him. He ate my bag of twix bites and drank 6 of those horrible half tea half lemonade things. I'll gladly let him have it if it gives me a little peace.

I'm going to see if he'll go work out with me. I know he needs to work a program but right now I'll take what I can get.

Mountainmanbob

Nothing wrong with tough love when it is used concerning the active drunk or addict.

Let them know -- this is no way to live (our) lives.

M-Bob

alwayscovering

Thank you. I'm hoping that this is an opening for him to get into a program.

aliciagr

It may be a good chance for him to begin healthier patterns. It usually takes about 6 weeks for new ways to become more of the norm. I think encouraging him by asking him to join you for a workout is great. Its about making healthy choices and feeling the benefit of them and those feelings motivate more positive change.

alwayscovering

Yea I know it takes much longer than I'll have to form new habits but I'm hoping that he'll at least feel some of the effects and it'll push him toward the right decisions. If not I always have my back up plan. While he's never acted like a lunatic in front of the kids I know he won't be able to control it as the disease progresses, I straight up told him if you ever act like that again I will leave and take our son. If I ever feel like our son is not safe in your care, I will leave. I never joke about my kids safety.

LexieCat

I was kind of like your husband, in that I could keep my drinking on a "short leash" temporarily, when I HAD to. It didn't make me want to stay sober--it just had me counting the minutes till I would drink again.

Alcoholism involves an obsession when the alcoholic isn't drinking. So I wouldn't put too much hope in the notion that he'll say, "Wow, I feel so much better--I think I'll give up drinking for good." And, if he's an alcoholic, "controlled" drinking isn't a long-term option.

alwayscovering

Oh I agree, he needs a program. I'm not deluded to think that he can just stop. right now I'm just looking forward to having some peace over the next few weeks.

I'm an optimistic person. I have my moments when I fall apart but I always get up and try to find a way to solve the problem that's in my way. That's just the way I am.

biminiblue

This is not your problem to solve.

"I'll let him have it..." in regards to the iced tea? As a recovering alcoholic myself, I balk at any words thrown my way that sound at all like attempted control of my behaviors. Heck, just as a human being.

alwayscovering

Um no I meant my junk food. I keep a stash for me myself and I. If I don't the kids will eat it all. He is free to go to the store and buy whatever junk he wants.

dandylion

junk food.....hmmm. I used to keep a drawer of candy bars when I was a coodinator of an alcoholism program. ...it made me very popular.
Lol....many of the clients would bring in donations of candy bars for the group...

At home...I have to hide junk food treats from the dog.....how come I can call her all day...and she will ignore me...but, she can hear the crinkle of cellophane anywhere in the house......and she can smell it when she is in a deep sleep......

dandylion

AnvilheadII

lol, our dog Bucky can hear a cheese wrapper from the top of the driveway. and it's a LONG driveway.

alwayscovering, while you have this period of "peace" it would actually be a good time to finesse that back up plan.