honeypig

Came across this on a website called Tiny Buddha. There is a TON of uplifting, enlightening, encouraging content there. I also found the following article, and I am going to implement the actions it suggests immediately if not sooner! The opening quote hooked me right in:

“To change skins, evolve into new cycles, I feel one has to learn to discard. If one changes internally, one should not continue to live with the same objects. They reflect one’s mind and the psyche of yesterday. I throw away what has no dynamic, living use.” ~Anais Nin

7 Decluttering Tips: How to Release Your Attachment to Your Stuff

I've made a lot of progress in getting rid of stuff that does not serve me, but it's been relatively easy b/c there was an awful lot of stuff that was not mine to start with or that I wasn't attached to. The harder work along those lines is going to be coming up soon, and I'm glad to have some guidelines.

I'd like to share one of the happy moments of the weekend: I sold a canoe that belonged to my bro and had been stored for 30+ years (reference to this in the gratitude thread on 6/17, I think). I didn't get a lot of money for it, but I was just so glad to see it get back into the stream of life and use! The guy who bought it said he'd send me a pic of him and his basset hound in it--and he DID send me a pic! I think the guy, the dog and the canoe are ALL smiling!

I felt so happy to have "released" the canoe to serve its purpose--canoes are made for the water, NOT to sit unused in a shed! Maybe it's ridiculous for me to feel so strongly, but I did and I do; in fact, it almost brings tears to my eyes. That gives me a big push to start releasing other things to go forth and serve their purpose instead of languishing in my stash, unused and/or unappreciated.

It's funny how recovery really does get practiced "in all our affairs", like the Steps say...

LexieCat

My folks are downsizing in preparation for a move to assisted living. My dad, especially, has been fretting over who's going to take all the antiques he and my mom collected over the years (I already have two big pieces they sent me years ago when they moved to HI, and I'm taking a rolltop desk/chair, a painting and a few small items). There simply isn't a place in my house, or my brother's house, for all the stuff they acquired (not to mention much of it is early American, which would not go well in my house). I've been telling him to think about how happy he and mom were to find and get these things, and that by sending them back out "into the world" (selling or donating), someone else can have the same happy pleasure of finding and displaying them.

Same principle as your canoe. If I took this stuff, it would be stashed where nobody would see/enjoy it--and I'd have the cost of moving it. I think he sort of gets it (though he tends to forget and ask again a few hours later).

mylifeismine

Honeypig,
What a wonderful new beginning for the canoe. it is a metaphor
for a life that blossoms when moved out of constrictive, restrictive
and stagnant surroundings to an environment supporting growth
and the use of God's gifts for life. Releasing oneself to go forth and
serve their purpose....... beautiful.

I just read "the life changing magic of tidying up" by marie kondo.
She says if it does not bring you joy, it goes. Declutter by category.
For each category, clothes, books, shoes, etc, you gather up all
items from everywhere in your home so you see how much of it
that you have. This method really has worked for me.

Eauchiche

Honey, thanks for this timely thread!!!!

Hawkeye13

great thread and ideas to think on. . .
there is a book called "spark joy" by a Japanese professional
organizer I've been reading.

She thinks things have sentience.
I tend to agree--they have a right to be "happy" in their purpose.
I've had way too much stuff denied purpose for too long. . .

Very helpful honeypig

honeypig

Hawkeye, I am inclined to agree w/her. I used to believe it was just cars once they reached a certain age, but I'm thinking it's way more widespread than that...

mylife, thanks for the idea about putting everything of a certain kind in a pile--I think seeing all those things collected would indeed be useful in letting go of some of them.

And Lexie, I can see how you'd need to be paring down your folks' belongings in preparation for the move--I'm glad you thought of the approach you did, so as to make it easier for them.

FireSprite

I really love this HP & your canoe story is simply fantastic. (& I love tiny buddha!) You know I agree with everything you all said about sentience. One of the most freeing things for me was purging my entire house & rearranging furniture, repainting whenever possible, etc.

One of the very last things that I found myself letting go of was all of my clothes in my "too big" sizes. It was like I couldn't quite get rid of that safety net "just in case".... and then I finally realized that in doing so, I was also passively creating space/allowance for it in my life. And really, what wasn't easily replaceable in a worst case scenario anyway?

I examined every item, in every drawer/closet/room for use - do we use it? Is it outdated? Are we still trying to FIND a purpose for it? Do we have 3 others, just like it? Does it have a lot of life left in it & we simply don't NEED it? If we aren't using it now, WHEN exactly will we? Going through this process when I'm debating buying something has really helped me to stop myself from overspending & cluttering things back up at times too.

It helps that my boss is particularly bad about this & I've seen her hold onto stuff until it expires or becomes outdated/useless.... it's been a great life lesson to see it from this side. No matter how good of a deal something is, it's worthless just sitting in a corner but she can't stop saving every little thing for a "special occasion", yet nothing ever seems to be special "enough" either. Guess what? Sometimes Tuesdays ARE special in my world.

I also find it freeing to go through electronic junk & remove it too - old emails, spam folders, deleted messages, old text messages, all of it. Great post!!

fred59

timely honeypig , the name cracks me up anyways today I need to start packing after 23 years in this house and getting rid of stuff I do not need is hard but necessary, good job letting go of canoe I have some things on craiglist I am trying to sell, it feels good.

honeypig

I just answered an email from someone who is interested in the elliptical I put on craigslist for free. It is top of the line but needs some very expensive repairs. I said "if you are up for the challenge of moving it out of my upstairs and for the expense of the repairs, you will have an extremely nice piece of equipment at a fraction of the cost." If he takes it, we are BOTH happy!

I also answered a request on a Freecycle site near me for a window AC. The woman who is interested is scheduled to come on Friday and pick it up.

There are so many ways to find new homes for what we no longer need and to help someone else in the process!

LexieCat

I gave a whole set of bedroom furniture and other miscellaneous stuff I was planning to sell/donate to one of my AA acquaintances whose home burned down (no insurance). They were falling all over themselves thanking me, and I said, hey, you're doing ME a favor. I'm happy to give things to people who can really use them.