Not really about ex...
 

Hey all I just needed to share somewhere! I'm closing on a house this week! It's bigger than I need, started buying it with ex now it's just me (always financially buying on my own... But it was to be for us... ) Then the **** hit the fan. The break happened when it was too far to back out...without losing a LOT of money.

I'm feeling really nervous! Trying to look at it as the house I'm buying for the life I WILL have not my current "it's complicated" situation.... But I'm having huge doubts!!

For the record it is basically my dream house... But it is way bigger than is needed for one!!

Gah!!!

CaveGirl....could you take in a renter/roommate....?

dandylion

I could, but I prefer not to, I really want it to be MY house. Haven't lived with a roomie in over 20 years... Unless it was a partner/husband.

Goodness, I'm jealous. You could have a walk in wardrobe / dressing room, a craft room, a book room, a tidy room (kept tidy for when people come round unexpectedly ). Woo hoo. When's the housewarming? Are we all invited?!

Seriously, you're likely to feel a nervous. Don't they say that it's one of the most stressful things we can do in outer lifetime (second only to dumping an alcoholic partner I reckon). But if this is your dream house, why not indulge yourself in some mental redecoration. Pinterest is great for creating idea boards for each room. Get together with some friends or family who are likely to enjoy the excitement with you and get dreaming. You are allowed to look forward to this.

Yeah I'm excited! I've worked very hard for this... Already planning a music room just for my vinyl... Can't wait...

But lord, it's a lot of money!

CaveGirl.....you didn't mention if it would be tight on your budget. or not.....

From experience, in today's world, it is a very wise thing to live below your means....not at the very edge of it.....lol.....
Financial security is a very important factor in one's overall peace of mind....
Remember that one is not one's house.......
However...home is where the heart is. Any place can be made special with love and "nesting" behaviors.....

what you can afford is a very personal decision that only you can make...we don't know all of your particulars.....

dandylion

All good! If its right its right, if it ends up being too big then at a later date you can move.

Congrats!!!

It's 30% of my take home pay so right inline and roughly the same amount as rent. I'm not going to be house poor, I never live beyond my means...I even have the six month cushion...so no worries on the money. I could have bought something smaller and cheaper though had I known this was going to be my situation.

I'd get a roomie if I needed one but as of now I'm good.It's just been a roller coaster of emotion! Just made the down payment... Yikes!

When I got the house I had a partner that I love ery much that I thought was sober... 60 days later sister is doing it for herself!!! I wasn't a decidedly less dramatic summer!

Just pray that it's built on solid ground, and that there isn't a retaining wall collapsing, ready to drag your house down with it.

From the voice of experience, that is all.

Use what you need of the house.

You were going to buy it anyway. You were going to pay for it anyway.

If its got the value there, don't worry about its size. You already said its your dream home. It will be YOUR dream home. The way you want it.

Another person will come into your life, sometime. In the meantime make the home yours.

I am in a similar situation. Its just me and a dog. I found my house and couldn't say not to it for the price.

Its 4000SF. I need about 1800 to live comfortably.

So I live downstairs and half the house (upstairs) is basically in mothballs.

I'm similar too. Had a great house about 1800sf for me and my two boys...sold it and bought one "together" (my money) with my guy since he had 4 kids too...half-finished the walk-out basement before I asked him to leave when he surprisingly relapsed into alcoholism I didn't know existed for him...

And now I live in a beautiful house that will be well over 4,000 sf when I finish the rest of the basement--with two boys who will be in college soon.

Feels ridiculous. But I do like the house, it's near my friends, and I'm so tired of moving. So for now I'm staying. I may specialize some rooms too, or just enjoy the quiet space, or get more dogs, or maybe volunteer as a temporary shelter for older kids who need a place to stay...

Who knows!

Sounds fabulous!!!!!