Great article about dating
 

Even though I am very far from being ready to date, I found this article helpful and thought it made a good point. I think all of us who have had to divorce an alcoholic now know what our values are and what the values of any future partner of ours needs to be.

You Probably Shouldn't Be Dating Them

jada, if I had ever brought any of those questions or that thought process to bear during my earlier days, I can't imagine how different my life might have been! Instead, I always felt so incredibly fortunate that someone would be interested in me that I didn't look any farther than that single fact...talk about non-discriminating!

But when you've never seen the kind of healthy behavior that the article talks about being modeled and you don't have any sense of boundaries or self-esteem, it simply doesn't happen.

Even tho dating is about the last thing on my list, those are good guidelines for any relationship, in my opinion, even if it's "just friends."

^ HP...yep. Mine too would be very different. At least now we know. Right? So not doomed to repeat the same mistakes. Growth is good and change is good!

Thanks for posting, I found the following very useful and a great reminder of why it´s good I broke up with xabf:

"If your relationship is going to fail, you WANT it to fail fast. Be honest about what you want. If he’s unwilling to give you what you want and won’t honor your feelings, or he runs away, isn’t that all you really need to know about him in terms of your long-term compatibility?"

I´ve been feeling very sad this past week, tormenting myself with doubts, so this came just in time.