cricket123

The ex fell down the stairs at his house toning and snapped his leg. (he lives in a tri level so his fall was not a long fall 6-8 steps) DD1 called her grandma and aunt back to the house to help(wise) and they called an ambulance. DD1 then called DD2 who was at my house to come back over there. In the mean time son was going to spend night at my house was called back to his dads(I do not have a problem with that)to help with his dad.

From what DD2 has told me it sounds like he was out of it, so sadly I have to assume he fell because he was drinking.

Ok my issue is I am secretly pleased the ex in-laws have to clean up this mess. Then I am concerned that my spousal support is going to be an issue for the next month or so. Then a little angry that my son is at the hospital at midnight helping to clean up this mess because he is a boy and the older sisters are at the ex's house. And to top it off I'm a bit concerned for the ex and would like to know how he is (suppressed - lived with him 32 years)

I want to be supportive for the kids but I also want to say - really, it serves him right(suppressed). Not sure if I should go get my just turned 18 year old son from the hospital or let it be. I did tell him to call me if he needs a ride.

so I'm going to head for bed and try to let it all go and let the circus take care of it. (The grandparents are over to the house 4-5 times a week- not my monkeys not my circus)

Cricket

maia1234

My old rule of thumb....when in doubt- dont!

amy55

I do understand how your feelings can be confusing at this time. I know mine were. My 18 y.o. daughter had to pick me up from the hospital the night my ex hit me. He didn't care about any of that. She didn't sleep the whole night, even though I did tell her to go home and to go to sleep, he was worried about her bailing him out of jail, and giving him a ride home.

Your son has many people to call for a ride. I agree, not your monkey, not your circus, get a good nights rest.

((((((hugs))))))
amy

amy55

Also, if you need to just talk, I will be up for the next hour or so. I do know how hard and confusing this is.

(((((hugs)))))
amy

Thomas45

In the words of John Lennon, let it be.

CodeJob

Keep mum dear Cricket. Ask about his time possibly needed for surgeries and healing in a caring tone. But don't comment on your assumptions as to how the accident happened. As for the rest, let it unfold without putting in your editorial.

This is exactly why you divorced - psychological distance. Learn to embrace it.

cricket123

I have been keeping mum and offering just minimal support. I see it this way ; xah did everything in his power to keep me spinning and going in circles and the ex inlaws keep saying everything was all my fault so they got him (the ex) back and they can take care of things. If my kids need something it will up to them to tell me.

I do have mixed feelings though, I feel bad for my 73 year old ex mother in law, she does not know what she has got herself into. And my poor kids now have to step up and do more for him at his house(mixed feelings on that too, they need to step up but not in the form of taking care of him) And knowing the ex, and son said something about this tonight, he is going to sign himself out of the hospital against dr's orders. oh and by the way he broke both the fibula and the tibia "tripping" on the last step. His surgery was yesterday and they put 2 plates in.

But at the end of the day I am liking the sidelines. It is almost entertaining if my kids were not involved.

dandylion

cricket....good for you at staying on the sidelines.

All of them have to learn to deal with life o n life's terms.......

by the way...all my years of working in the hospital...when someone said that they wanted to sign out against medical advice....we would inform them that their insurance would not cover them, if they did so.......
That stopped them in their tracks most every time......

dandylion

cricket123

That stopped them in their tracks most every time......

Humm knowing him it would not stop him, maybe they can tranquilized him until Thursday.

Besides no one knows he drinks so where is he going to get his next drink at? imho I still think they did not want to do his surgery on Saturday because they wanted to bring down his blood alcohol level.

son just text saying he's coming home. dumb

dandylion

cricket.....if they know that his blood alcohol level was that high,,,,,they will know that he is "Jones'in to get out to drink.....and, chances are that they will afford him some sedation......

If he were to sign out, prematurely, I suggest that you leave it entirely up to your ex to take care of him.......

dandylion