It was a figure of speech
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,872
^ yep-I was a victim of that figure of speech many times. My favorite one was "I'd do anything for you". Figure of speech (anything did not include getting sober, growing up, stop abusing, acting like a bully and five year old-itwas just a figure of speech!)
Yes Anvil,
I think I love you is a figure of speech. Especially when used within a minute of the other infamous figure of speech.
Bit hey, apparently he can't believe how much I've been jerking him around. I guess that by his dictionnaty's definition, I want to be treated with respect is a synonym for I'm jerking you around.
I think I love you is a figure of speech. Especially when used within a minute of the other infamous figure of speech.
Bit hey, apparently he can't believe how much I've been jerking him around. I guess that by his dictionnaty's definition, I want to be treated with respect is a synonym for I'm jerking you around.
Fourourgirls! Ahh yes the "I would do anything, really, anything" figure of speech! It seems to be that on top of reading from the same book for excuses and justifications, they all seem to have the same figure of speech phrase book.
Oh and here is one of of funny justification. About a month a go, I found that my bottle of gin that had maybe 2 onces left in it was sitting empty in the cupboard where I had put it. When I asked him why the empty bottle was still there (I think the last time I used that bottle was last May) he said :
"Well, when yoy had the flu, one night you went to bed and left me all alone, I was playing video games and I was bored, so i finished it"
"Well yes I realise you finished it, but why on earth didn't you put the bottle in the recycling bin?"
"Well I knew your mother was coming to town a few days after, I didn't her to wonder why you had an empty bottle of gin in the recycling bin"
Sure, because my mother would question the fact that her 33 year-old daughter sometimes have a G&T and drinks less than a bottle every 2 yes. Sure, that makes sense.
Oh and here is one of of funny justification. About a month a go, I found that my bottle of gin that had maybe 2 onces left in it was sitting empty in the cupboard where I had put it. When I asked him why the empty bottle was still there (I think the last time I used that bottle was last May) he said :
"Well, when yoy had the flu, one night you went to bed and left me all alone, I was playing video games and I was bored, so i finished it"
"Well yes I realise you finished it, but why on earth didn't you put the bottle in the recycling bin?"
"Well I knew your mother was coming to town a few days after, I didn't her to wonder why you had an empty bottle of gin in the recycling bin"
Sure, because my mother would question the fact that her 33 year-old daughter sometimes have a G&T and drinks less than a bottle every 2 yes. Sure, that makes sense.
Healthy again: nice suggestion!
And yes, soon to be ex. He'll say that he will do everyting, everything to fix it and show me he is the man for me. I will then proceed to telling him that I've heard it all before and I will tell him what my boundaries are:
I will not be in a relationship with an alcoholic that his not taking care of his problem.
I will not spend more time than necessary or be in a relationship with someone who doesn't treat me with respect
I will not be in a realtionship where there is no trust
I won't be with someone who always blame others for his mistakes
I want a partner, not the illusion of one
So yeah, soon to be ex boyfriend as I don't see how this man could ever respect those boundaries.
And yes, soon to be ex. He'll say that he will do everyting, everything to fix it and show me he is the man for me. I will then proceed to telling him that I've heard it all before and I will tell him what my boundaries are:
I will not be in a relationship with an alcoholic that his not taking care of his problem.
I will not spend more time than necessary or be in a relationship with someone who doesn't treat me with respect
I will not be in a realtionship where there is no trust
I won't be with someone who always blame others for his mistakes
I want a partner, not the illusion of one
So yeah, soon to be ex boyfriend as I don't see how this man could ever respect those boundaries.
Healthy again: nice suggestion!
And yes, soon to be ex. He'll say that he will do everyting, everything to fix it and show me he is the man for me. I will then proceed to telling him that I've heard it all before and I will tell him what my boundaries are:
I will not be in a relationship with an alcoholic that his not taking care of his problem.
I will not spend more time than necessary or be in a relationship with someone who doesn't treat me with respect
I will not be in a realtionship where there is no trust
I won't be with someone who always blame others for his mistakes
I want a partner, not the illusion of one
So yeah, soon to be ex boyfriend as I don't see how this man could ever respect those boundaries.
And yes, soon to be ex. He'll say that he will do everyting, everything to fix it and show me he is the man for me. I will then proceed to telling him that I've heard it all before and I will tell him what my boundaries are:
I will not be in a relationship with an alcoholic that his not taking care of his problem.
I will not spend more time than necessary or be in a relationship with someone who doesn't treat me with respect
I will not be in a realtionship where there is no trust
I won't be with someone who always blame others for his mistakes
I want a partner, not the illusion of one
So yeah, soon to be ex boyfriend as I don't see how this man could ever respect those boundaries.
If you've never said you won't be in a relationship with an alcoholic that his not taking care of his problem, then that would probably be really really good for him to hear if you can 100% follow through. If you HAVE said it to him before, then you will probably have the same outcome as before and it's pointless to day it again.
If the relationship isn't working for you, that is all you are obligated to say, and it may save you some headache - we try SO HARD to make irrational people see rationale.
Good luck to ya. When I was finally done, I felt like I had been riding Darkside Daryl's delusional train to hell and it took some doing to stop my head from spinning from the craziness of it all. Looking back - me trying to TALK the alcoholic into sobriety or respecting me just kept pouring coals into the engine.
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: SoCal
Posts: 73
"I want a partner, not the illusion of one"
OMG Thank you for this! It very succinctly says what I've been struggling with finding the words to say. (And I too have heard that he'd "do whatever it takes" to get sober, etc. - everything apparently except actually quit drinking. It'd be hilarious if it weren't my life lol!)
Oh, and I second the vote for this as the quack of the year!
OMG Thank you for this! It very succinctly says what I've been struggling with finding the words to say. (And I too have heard that he'd "do whatever it takes" to get sober, etc. - everything apparently except actually quit drinking. It'd be hilarious if it weren't my life lol!)
Oh, and I second the vote for this as the quack of the year!
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