CJade

Hi guys. I've never posted anywhere like here before. I don't like to talk about this stuff with people but I'm at the point where I'm a total loss for what to do. This might be a bit long winded so please bare with me.

I still live at home with my mum and 2 sisters aged 22 and 8.
My mum is an alcoholic and has been for as long as I can remember. I suppose to an extent she's a functioning alcoholic? She keeps up with work commitments and rent is always paid but almost every evening and weekend she will sit and drink herself stupid until she passes out. When she's been drinking she's like a time bomb, her moods are all over the place and in the past she's been violent -although not since my sister and I have gotten old enough to stop her should she lash out. She has been particularly bad with her drinking recently, last weekend she was drunk by 11.30am on Saturday morning, she could barely even stand up. On the Monday I managed to catch her before she started drinking to have a conversation with her about it. I said I was worried about how much she was drinking and wanted to talk. It didn't go down well - she denied that she drinks at all and told me to f*ck off away from her and she hasn't spoken to me since.
My main issue now is that I'm about to leave home to live with my boyfriend but I'm worried sick about my 8 year old sister. My other sister works long hours in a restaurant/bar so there will be long periods when the youngest is left alone with mum. Until now we've managed well enough between us but there have been a lot of times where we've both had to work at the same time and I've come home to find my mum passed out with my younger sister hysterical that mummy won't wake up. She's passed out with the oven on several times. I hate myself for leaving it so long to seek advice about this but I honestly don't know what to do. It's not safe for my sister to be left alone with my mum but with mum so deep in denial what are my options?

I'm sorry if this is rambling but I'm trying to include the important details and my mind is a little confused right now. I feel sad and hurt and like alcohol is more important to my mum than her children are. I suppose I've been in a bit of denial myself to a point. I thought if I tried to talk to my mum calmly she'd respond well but it just didn't happen.
Any advice anyone could offer would be so appreciated.

LexieCat

Hi, and I'm sorry for your difficult situation. I think you're a great sister to be worried (and, I think, with VERY good cause) about your little sister. I hate to have to suggest it, but it seems to me that you're going to have to disclose this to child protective services (or whatever equivalent type of authority you have where you live). This is a very dangerous situation she is in.

Is there any possibility she could live with you and your boyfriend? If not, your sister would probably be much better off in a loving foster home (where you could continue to maintain contact with her). I know that sounds very scary, but you could continue to be a stabilizing presence in her life.

Hugs,

HHTexas

Welcome! Glad you are here I agree with Lexie. Is your 22 yo sister willing to be a guardian? Definitely something CPS should be aware of. Just because they are involved doesn't mean they'll remove. It may be the bottom your mom needs to hit to seek treatment. Huge hugs to you ♡♡♡