the murky middle
 

STBX has sobered up I think. Hasnt been blowing up my phone. I sent an email asking what he would like to do with the house. He said he wasn't sure, feeling shell shocked. I get that. Back at the ranch, I've not yet won the lottery. I need him to contribute. Even a small amount. He's still on my cell phone plan, car insurance, etc.

Trying to save on legal fees but I think I'm finally going to have to get those temporary orders.

Do I try to broach this with him or is it hot air lol? Honestly, I still fear his anger. And I don't know why. He's never been physical. And I still care to not hurt him-even though he's hurt me!

Feeling a little crazy. I'm not a good at limbo...

Hmmm...I would powwow with your lawyer. Sometimes you *can't* take someone off insurance, etc., while a divorce is pending, so I would ask about that.

I don't think that the fact that he may, or may not, have sobered up is relevant at this point. Even if he is DRY, he is likely not working a program, nor is there any way for him to have made great strides in real recovery during this short period of time anyway if he IS working a program.

The fact is, it's not even entirely about YOU. You guys have a child together, and he is obligated to support that child. That's the law, regardless of whether it "hurts him" or not.

If it were me, I would go ahead and have the lawyer file the paperwork to get a temporary support order in place. The longer you wait to take care of it, the harder it will be to do.

:grouphug:

Wisconsin is spot on with her advice--get the order filed w/ the lawyer,
and check with her about how / what to tell him when.
That's what you're paying her for.

Push forward. He is most likely full of hot air or only abstaining (or claiming to abstain) so you won't change anything in his little life. I'd say get the temp orders in place-who gives a crap what he's doing? He's had years to understand or make a change. Oh well-time to move on for you!

Got the attny meeting set up. Amazing I felt 50% less stressed after doing so. Whew.

Now to cut back cable/internet/trade for a cheaper car.