vacationgirl

needing help and prayer - husband who was very very bad alcoholic is on his 11th year of sobriety at age 58 - he also became a narcotics addict after a horrible drunken accident. He has embraced AA for past 10 years and is a miracle to be alive. we are on vacation in Mexico with high school friends so people we have known for40+ years meaning they are long time friends. we are on a beautiful beachfront condo and myself and friends are drinking which we do frequently over past 10 years when we get together. Please read part 2 below as instructions said not to make posts more than 400 words - thank you

AnvilheadII

i'm sorry, i think i'm missing what you are SAD about? are you saying he IS drinking or are you sad that he cannot drink?

CelticZebra

Why is help & prayer needed? Sounds like a normal get together faction as you described it.
Is there more to this post?
Is your husband taking drugs?/alcohol?
I pray this is not the case, and you can enjoy your time with longstanding friends & your husband

Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself

vacationgirl

Husband started acting funny - sleeping a lot - has a big bruise on his side and is complaining it hurts badly but says he can't remember how he got it but he has also been acting drunk or stoned from pills - he tried to teach us a yoga class this morning and couldn't keep his balance and within an hour was stumbling - two of my friends are nurses one am ER nurse and they both do not think he has had a stroke or anything else so I decided to not go to Mexican hospital. He did not want to go either. I gave him choices that we needed to rule out stroke etc or if he could just tell me if he is using of course he says he isn't - Unsure how to handle - should I just go on and try to enjoy our remaining three days or call ambulance. We are on very tight budget and don't - I really feel like all the hospital would do is confirm he is using. thank you . Sad in mexico

Carlotta

I would strongly suggest calling an ambulance and see if there is an American hospital where you are at.
People very rarely relapse after 11 years of sobriety (it can happen but it's rare) and it might be something serious. Better being safe than sorry.
Also a lot of men can be really pig headed when it comes to going to the hospital. I took a friend to the ER last week (good thing too it was an aneurism) and it was like pulling teeth getting him to go.

AnvilheadII

i agree that taking him to a Doctor or Hospital is the wisest course of action - if he is unwell, the sooner he gets medical treatment the better.

AnvilheadII

ps - about posts and word count.....i'd never heard of a 400 word count limit? maybe just for new members til they get a bit more settled?

DesertEyes

No limit on SR. It sounds like a foreign ISP is doing a proxy.

Mike
Moderator, SR

redatlanta

It could be possible he has some head trauma, so it probably would be best to get him to a hospital. If it ends up he relapsed and lied that would suck, but it would suck way more if he has a bleed and doesn't get it attended to.

vacationgirl

Thanks to those of you that responded and prayed. We got back from dinner tonight and husband was sitting on steps waiting for us and apologized for drinking - thank God he didn't suffer from some type of stroke or aneurysm or something. I knew in my gut he was using but he came clean to me and my friends and it was almost a joyful experience - never would have thought of this as a joyful experience in my "old" life. I started to feel my old behavior creeping back in... Getting very angry etc but with God's help I was able toget past all that junk and go out in this beautiful city in the Caribbean and have a nice meal with my friends. Hoping he will stay sober another ten years but if he doesn't I know good will take care of me. Thanks to all.

vacationgirl

Just came by to say I feel so good to not be living in crazy town anymore - in my old life I would have not left him alone - I would have cried and gotten angry and maybe even a little violent - I would have ruminated about him and where was he and when and why and how etc - God is good all the time and all the time God is good - off to enjoy the next two days of vacation. Blessings to all of you

HHTexas

Good for you. Glad he's reasonably ok. My A relapsed on a caribbean vacation a few years ago. Looks like you are handling it better than I did! Hugs ♡♡

hopeful4

I am very impressed! Impressed that you are putting the focus on your own reaction, and realizing that you are not letting this take you over as you would have before. Well done!

Enjoy your vacation!

CodeJob

Thankful it was not a stroke or aneurysm. Take care and enjoy the beach!

CelticZebra

Well done on remaining calm and focuses!
Your gut instinct was spot on with your husbands behaviour and I'm so glad you didn't allow it to become your problem too.
A shame for you, granted, yet a much better outcome than could have been anticipated, pleased he came clean and stopped worrying you all.
Hoping you enjoy your vacation irregardless of your husbands behaviour.
Good for you

Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself

vacationgirl

Wanted to give all of you sweet people an update... husband drank for that one day, and took each of our friends aside and personally apologized. He has been to two AA meetings and we have been home only 24 hours. He is meeting with his sponsor tonight, so sounds like he is doing what he needs to do and I am doing what I need to do. I hope anyone out there who is struggling will see this as hope. My husband was one of the worst alcoholics ever. Been to rehab 7+ times, been in very bad car wreck with our children, he almost died, and our almost 5 year old was seriously injured. He did recover but was told he would never walk unassisted again (crushed lungs, pelvis, ankle, head injury). Fast forward 14 years, and my daughter with spinal injury is great basketball and soccer player, and is now playing rugby in college. He is not only NOT using a cane but is teaching pilates, cycle, water aerobics, etc. A MIRACLE HAPPENED IN OUR LIVES. So, wanting this post to give some of you hope. Hope that YOU can recover from the insanity of your family member's sickness. And sometimes, they will recover too! We must do our part and take care of ourselves. Love, Peace, and Joy to all. Good night.

Liveitwell

Wonderful post. Yes-alcoholism is a struggle each day for them. Sounds like he's doing the right thing by reaching out for help again. And you? You are rocking recovery!!! I too reacted with anger, not leaving him alone and the constant wondering where he was, etc etc. nice to just not do that anymore. You are awesome. Hugs!