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Another reason I'm glad to be done!!

Old 01-18-2016, 01:42 PM
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Another reason I'm glad to be done!!

So my ex messages me and tells me the reason he didn't call all last week was bc he was in the hospital with pneumonia for four days (if y'all don't recall last month it was a seizure that put him in ICU and before that it wS a car wreck-it's always sonething). I say supposedly bc God only knows, literally, what's the truth at this point-he's told so many lies that I can't keep up and don't care to! But, if true, that's awful and I don't wish anything bad to happen to him.

So, fast forward to this morning waking up from a dream where I recalled after my ex was put into ICU about five years ago bc of a very rare heart issue....of course the doctor told me he should stop drinking (told him too!) but all I got was literally cursed out by his mother bc in her words "you put my boy into ICU-you stress him out too much and make him unhappy", etc, etc. Yep! My fault! So, I woke up thinking that with her logic that now SHE is to blame for her sons deteriorating health bc he lives with her. Right?! No, I'm sure it's still somehow my fault too!

Sad, but not true. Her twisted and sick head blamed me for anything with her "boy" and even told me it was my fault her son treated me the way he did. Lovely!! My psychoanalysis sees that she deep down thinks she caused her husband to abuse her so projects that into me as well and that she is a failure bc she couldn't get her husband to stop drinking. Yikes. I recall feeling that too-that I was to blame for my husbands abuse-that I made him great me that way-so wished she would have joined me at AlAnon bc none of that was her fault. Oh well.

All this to say, thank GOD I don't have to deal with that any more!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was sick and twisted beyond belief and I honestly don't know how I survived for so long.

God keeps sending me lovely reminders....ever so grateful for those!
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Old 01-19-2016, 12:12 PM
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It seems we have the same xAH and same ex horrible MIL.

The ONLY relief I have of my divorce finally being final is knowing that I NEVER ever have to see that angry, enabling woman in court again, supporting and tsk tsking her sick abuser son...
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Old 01-19-2016, 12:40 PM
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^ oh that day can't come soon enough. My ex MIL witnessed abuse with my children and did mothing, broke court orders, lied, etc-all to help her poor baby boy. Yep-I feel ya. Sick. Like I said, so glad to be out and thank God my girls have a healthy momma that leads them in serving The Lord and always telling the truth! They aren't getting raised with "protect the family, we protect one another, mafia mentality"-they are being raised to respect themselves and tell the truth-no matter what.
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Old 01-19-2016, 12:51 PM
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Wanttobehealthy-my ex mil actually screamed at me one time telling me " my baby boy works so hard and should be able to get drunk whenever he wants to. You're just not a good wife". Yeppers! She's also called the police on me, showed up with her son to try and bully me, etc. It's so sad but not my problem. It's all hers! And the mother and grandmother of the year award goes to......drumroll......
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Old 01-19-2016, 08:16 PM
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And yes, I'm a member of a mommas boy recovery forum as well. It's amazing how many of us have similar stories and each mother in law shares the same characteristics-just like their abusjve sons can be pegged easily as well. I've seen so many "apple tree moments" in the last few years it makes my head hurt a little. Not my life anymore!
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Old 01-20-2016, 10:35 AM
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It's amazing when you look back to see all you endured, and the relief you get when you don't have to deal with that one thing anymore!

Hugs to you!
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