My Addict niece DIED last night.....

Old 01-18-2016, 08:04 AM
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My Addict niece DIED last night.....

I am beyond heartbroken. She was addicted to prescription pain medication prescribed by Doctors.
She took for years ,several and they new she was addicted.
She was to far gone to be of sound mind to get help.She was in hospital a few weeks ago and they let her out.
I am now so concerned for my AD who has her own issues with prescription medications drugs and mental illness .We have asked her to move out in February .
Now I am really scared as to what to do.
Should I say she took her life or say her heart stopped.
I am terrified!!
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:08 AM
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It sounds like it might have been an accidental overdose....

If I may ask---how is your daughter reacting to this...?

dandylion
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:08 AM
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You tell the truth, friend. Addiction has consequences and there is no changing that. Many hugs to you in your grief. I am so sorry.
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:13 AM
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I am so sorry, BlueHawaii, so very sorry.
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:19 AM
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Originally Posted by SparkleKitty View Post
You tell the truth, friend. Addiction has consequences and there is no changing that. Many hugs to you in your grief. I am so sorry.
I agree with this. Truth.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:22 AM
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I'm very sorry for your loss.
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:28 AM
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I'm sorry for your loss. Very tragic.
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Old 01-18-2016, 08:32 AM
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I'm so very sorry for your loss. So sad. Sending you and your family prayers.
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:13 AM
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So very sorry.
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:19 AM
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Originally Posted by dandylion View Post
It sounds like it might have been an accidental overdose....

If I may ask---how is your daughter reacting to this...?

dandylion
They are saying it was suicide...my ad doesn't know yet as she is at work.
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:23 AM
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Originally Posted by THippy View Post
I agree with this. Truth.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
How do you tell someone that who is vulnerable and possibly susceptible to suicide?
She will use this to threaten me when things don't go her way.
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:24 AM
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I am so sorry to hear that ...if it is actually true. Personally, I would make absolutely sure of the facts before repeating it to someone else.
Maybe, you could say something like..."she has passed from an apparent overdose of a medication...that is all I know about it".

this is very difficult and I am sooo sorry....

dandylion

I think you have to do the exact thing that you would do if this HAD NOT HAPPENED.....
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:53 AM
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I am so sorry. The casualties of addiction are heartbreaking. Love and peace to you and your family.
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Old 01-18-2016, 09:59 AM
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Originally Posted by dandylion View Post
I am so sorry to hear that ...if it is actually true. Personally, I would make absolutely sure of the facts before repeating it to someone else.
Maybe, you could say something like..."she has passed from an apparent overdose of a medication...that is all I know about it".

this is very difficult and I am sooo sorry....

dandylion

I think you have to do the exact thing that you would do if this HAD NOT HAPPENED.....
I'm so sorry for your loss, Bluehawaii. I'd like to second the thoughts from dandy's post, especially that last line.
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Old 01-18-2016, 10:03 AM
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Originally Posted by honeypig View Post
I'm so sorry for your loss, Bluehawaii. I'd like to second the thoughts from dandy's post, especially that last line.
I agree-you cannot allow her to hold you "hostage" for the rest of your life.

Stick to the move-out date as planned--if she wants treatment or therapy,
maybe support her in that but don't allow her to stay in your home.
She is an adult, and you cannot live her life for her or protect
her from her choices. She has a right to make them.

I'm very sorry for your niece's passing BH
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Old 01-18-2016, 10:31 AM
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I am so sorry for the loss of your niece. That must be a horrible nightmare for you. Please know that we are all here for you.

Originally Posted by Bluehawaii View Post
... She will use this to threaten me when things don't go her way.....
When things don't go her way she will find _something_ to threaten you with. It doesn't matter what she finds. She will poke around and try a million different things until she finds something that hurts you and she will use that.

Originally Posted by Bluehawaii View Post
...How do you tell someone that who is vulnerable and possibly susceptible to suicide? ....
If she threatens suicide you respond the way you would respond to _anybody_, whether a family member or a stranger on the street. You call 911 and have the experts help her. You are not a shrink, you don't have the skills or training to know how to help someone who is threatening suicide.

If your daughter were to have a heart attack in your living room you would _not_ go get a kitchen knife and sewing thread and do the surgery yourself. You would call 911. Suicide is no different, you don't do the "mind surgery" yourself, you call for help.

Mike
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Old 01-18-2016, 11:03 AM
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My deep sympathy during this painful period. Regarding your daughter, you can't control her actions if she lives with you or elsewhere. I suggest sticking to your guns.
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Old 01-18-2016, 11:14 AM
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My condolences to you, BH.

I agree with the others -- as hard as the path may be, if it's the right one, stick to it.
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Old 01-18-2016, 11:31 AM
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I'm so very sorry.

Regarding your daughter, if she "uses" this...I might be inclined to say "yes, it's so sad the choices people make. I'm making choices to hopefully enjoy a full, long life for myself--and I can't do that for you or anyone else. Maybe this is a good time for you to examine your choices"

(...in your own apartment...)

Hugs to you.
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Old 01-18-2016, 01:14 PM
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I'm so sorry Blue. Many prayers for your family.

As for your daughter, before this happened she has threatened you with everything but the kitchen sink. Threatening you with suicide is nothing new. Call 911 if she does as Mike suggests.
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