To destroy photos or not

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11-26-2015, 07:09 AM

# 21 (permalink)

honeypig

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Join Date: Mar 2013

Location: Midwest

Posts: 11,481

Quote:

Your love wasn't a lie, even if his was.

Stung, thanks for this ^^ insight! I've been struggling w/the "how could it all have been a lie" blues for a while now myself and looking at it this way is helpful in coming to grips w/things.

Quote:

Make copies. Put the originals in a safety deposit box for you kid and burn the copies. It'll feel cathartic, I'm sure, for you and then you'll allow your kid to make the choice to keep those memories or ditch them when he's older.

I think this ^^ is a good thought also. I'm in a similar place, trying to see what I want to let go of and how to do that. The idea of a ceremony of some kind was suggested to me on another recovery site, and I have been researching this. I have New Year's Eve and Day off of work and am planning a sort of mini-retreat for myself w/a massage scheduled, plenty of time on my own w/no "to do" pressures, and definitely a ritual of letting go to be performed then.

I'd agree w/all those who say to get the items out of your face but don't destroy them; finding a way to let go of those things in such a way that you yourself feel freed but yet you haven't taken away future choices from your child seems to me to be your best choice.

11-26-2015, 05:15 PM

# 22 (permalink)

fluffyflea

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Join Date: Feb 2007

Posts: 1,826

Keep them for your son.

Quote:

Originally Posted by killerinstinct

Think I am ready to delete all of my photos of my marriage... Does anyone think that's too dramatic and not best for my son? I like seeing my history in general but can't stand to see why I should keep anything based on lies in my history file especially because he left us.