I can only control ME
 

There is something to be said about taking small steps to do things. I find myself doing more around my house bc I tell myself come on its only just one lil thing. I actually like the new thought process. School is back in session for me and am determined to not give up and finish this damn degree. Now in reference to my exabf ummm, we have had contact with each other. He showed up at my house I let him in, and he wanted to talk. A large part of me wanted to see him and that's why I let him in. We watched a movie and didn't really talk. He wanted to start talking about things and said to him whats the point. Your not going to change any of your current habits. I can't control your drinking and I know I didn't cause it. If you choose to be a drunk that's on you not me. I am training myself to not hve any expectations of you. He just looked at me in silence. I wasn't yelling or crying. I was actually pretty flat. I can't feed into anyone else drama anymore.

And in the interest of controlling YOU, maybe next time he shows up, you tell him, "There's nothing to talk about. Please stop contacting me."

I just read a saying, the other day....."Yard by yard--life is hard"..."Inch by inch--it is a cinch."

dandylion

You handled things well G,, but don't dance with the devil will you? He might think he can come around whenever he feels like some company. Hard as it might be, tell him to go away.
You've done the hard yards so don't risk a setback.