X creating stress
 

well STBXAH had the 2 kids that are home up early this morning. I asked them where they were headed. Well Son told me that his grandparents were thinking of moving and they were going to go help them. hum

STBXAH took off for an hour the other night with the 2 that are home and I don't know where they went just asked when they would be back.

Also last night I was using my daughters laptop and I seen an unknown device was attached to it. She was sleeping and could not answer any question at the time. I mentioned it to her this morning and STBXAH had her out on the back deck talking to her intensely. He then had her bring her laptop with them. (why?)

STBXAH is also thinking of moving. Is this a cover? I don't care if he is moving or the grandparents are moving. I just don't want to walk into my house and find everything gone and I want to be prepared emotionally. I don't know who is staying or who is going. I have not even told my kids I am keeping the house because everything I say seems to get back to him and causes me grief. Very much a controlling issue for him.

I apologized to my son for asking because I don't want to put him in the middle. I think he understood. I am trying extremely hard not to put them in the middle.

Cricket:headbange

From what you're reported, this is what he does. This is who he is. If you are worried about preparing yourself emotionally for some future unpredictable event, I would suggest going ahead and doing it, regardless of whether it comes to pass. The sooner you two are separated physically, the less stress and worry you will have in your everyday life, but it certainly seems he is going to do everything that he can to make the time in between as chaotic as possible.

Cricket, it seems so exhausting for your to be doing all this detective work, and it seems like he gets a kick out of keeping you in the dark. Is there a way for you to bow out of this game? Can you trust that more will be revealed and you will learn in time all the information you need to know? It sounds like you have yourself taken care of. You've got the house. What he and your children do is up to them. They are grown and will have to make their own choices. So maybe just focus your energy on finding other things to enrich your life besides playing their games? What do you enjoy? Hobbies? Volunteering? The more independent of them you can become, the better!

Working on doing different things. Right now I work 2 jobs my mine one dosen't work much in the summer so I've been working the other. I would like to do more than work. I did sign up for a online class. Thinking about the gym and other stuff but waiting, not sure why I'm waiting.

Do something just for you this weekend, Cricket. You need to refocus on you.