Update

Old 08-12-2015, 07:01 PM
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Update

So I was asked for an update. I tried 3 times on my laptop n lost them so I'm on phone now.

Hubby is drinking so he's technically my AH on here now. It doesn't take much for him to get drunk since he has a TBI from the motorcycle accident. Can you believe it's been 2 years?! I know I can't. I knew if He survived he wouldn't be the same and he's not. He suffers from short term memory loss and remembers nothing! He doesn't even remember pictures that I took of him, the baby n our dogs. I think that there is more going on but getting him to agree to go to the Dr is another story. But I do believe Alzheimer's and or Dementia will be on our door step soon enough. I'll take care of that when it makes itself more clear to me. We had an issue the other day that makes me wonder if it'll be here sooner than later and He wasn't drunk. He thought for sure we had a conversation that never took place. He asked me this morning, did we really not talk about that?! I said no n He shook his head n told me how real it was. He doesn't know if he was awake or not but he was adamant it happened. He felt like I was making him crazy. It scares me that his mind may be going.

He's like a box of chocolates. He can be so sweet n then so bitter n nasty. I deal with him according to how he is. If He thinks he has been horrible, he will tell me how sorry He is n I tell him to just be quiet, n do better n he says ok. Why yell n scream over it? He won't remember n it frustrates us both. He can be such a jerk too but I pray that God makes him sleepy. I fill his belly n tell him to go lay down or go float in the pool. Just get away from me before I punch him in the forehead which never happens. lol

As far as I'm concerned, I'm ok. Getting greyer by the day but I'm good. Just had my gallbladder removed n feel much better. I'm back to work. Haven't had the little one because I'm not allowed to lift But she's been stopping over to use the pool with her Momma n Daddy. I'm getting ready for October Tree Stand Therapy. I have been filling the freezer with meals for AH so he doesn't starve while I'm in the woods. He does know Its coming n he does know he doesn't like It.

So. Nothing much has changed. He's drinking. Has brain injury n memory loss n I'm just like... We'll get through it together. I'm not leaving. I'm ok with what I have n don't have. Someday it will be over n if God takes him, I'll then so be it. If God takes me first then so be it. Never know who's going before the other but if I get out of This marriage alive, I'm going to fall in love with myself n laugh at the first dude who tries to pick me up. I'm so over men. I've never lived on my own n that is my plan if I get a chance.
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Old 08-12-2015, 07:07 PM
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Box, It's good to hear from you. I'm sorry hubby is drinking and experiencing memory problems.

How is your shoulder? I'm not sure I ever knew what the diagnosed problem was, but am glad you'll be able to hunt this season.

Hope you've been enjoying your beautiful pool you worked so hard on
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Old 08-12-2015, 07:18 PM
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There is nothing wrong with my shoulder. It's in my neck or spine. I'm going for a milogram or something like that on Monday.

I've been in the pool this year. Weather has been weird. AH loves the pool. I've had to pull him to the steps a time or 2 because he's fallen asleep in there.

I'm not mad at him. I'm over being disappointed. This is life. Our life.
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Old 08-12-2015, 07:26 PM
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Well, kiddo, it sounds as if you've made your peace with the situation as it is. Come to a place of acceptance. And if you're good with that, then you're good with that. I'm glad you have happy things in your life--hunting, your pool, your little cutie-pie.

I know you love him, and I hope with whatever brain cells he has working he appreciates you.

So good to see you back here.
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Old 08-12-2015, 07:46 PM
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I have made my peace with it. He has good n bad days. The head injury doesn't help. It is what it is. He looks at me with a lot of love n I do the same when things are good. He's something special to me even if he drinks excessively. I think I deal with him pretty well n adjusted accordingly since the accident.

What keeps me standing here beside him is knowing that this is it for me. I'll never let another man in my life. My picker is broke n its Getting retired. haha I'll devote my life to taking care of him, loving our granddaughter n playing with our dogs.
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Old 08-12-2015, 07:59 PM
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JJ. This is AH's boy. lol


My Mummy Ava


Boo


Our granddaughter Leonard (that's what AH calls her n yes, She comes to it! ) She just got out of the pool n is getting warm. lol
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Old 08-12-2015, 08:05 PM
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Leonard??? LOL, what a beauty queen!
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Old 08-12-2015, 08:25 PM
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Lol yes! He calls her Leonard or Lenny. I call her Lynnie but her mother calls her Lindsey. She knows who she is. I miss our time together. I have til the 23rd n I can have her. When I go over, she sees me, She drops everything n gets this big smile on her face n claps her hands. She is my pride n joy. I love being her LaLa. She just adores me n is such a good baby. I have a surprise for her when she comes over because I painted her kitchen (my kitchen but It's really ours) red n blue. Cabinets are red n trim is blue n walls aren't done yet but they will be white.






Jimmy doesn't like the blue but I do n it's my kitchen. I May tattoo some stars on the cabinets too.
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Old 08-13-2015, 05:18 AM
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Thank you for the update Box!
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Old 08-13-2015, 05:19 AM
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Wow--pretty spectacular! She'll love the colors.
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Old 08-13-2015, 05:34 AM
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Originally Posted by CodeJob View Post
Thank you for the update Box!
It ain't the best update. Wish it could have been better but we all know how alcoholics are. Especially ones with years of abuse behind them.
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Old 08-13-2015, 06:05 AM
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I looooove JJ and Leonard.

Good to hear from you.
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Old 08-13-2015, 06:22 AM
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Florence, JJ is very lucky he's cute. I'm talking VERY lucky! He gets his lips pinched daily.
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Old 08-13-2015, 06:53 AM
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Hey Box!! What a delight to hear from you! Your journey has been one of tremendous strength and acceptance. I feel humbled, actually.
I do know, that in this l ife, we never know what we will face and learn to accept.

I think you have a clever decorating scheme for your kitchen. Your grandaughter will probably carry the memories of your kitchen for the rest of her life!
I still carry the memories of every detail of my grandmother's kitchen.
I think the k itchen is the heart of the home.

Thanks for the update and the pictures of your sweet babies.

Hang around, won't ya'........


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Old 08-13-2015, 07:07 AM
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I'll see what I can do. Archery Season is coming up.
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Old 08-13-2015, 07:26 AM
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Hi Boxin!
so good to see you. Been wondering how things were for you.

love the pictures, and your grandbaby is a beautiful little girl!

I too hope you stick around. Glad you got the gallbladder thing done,,, its made a difference for me. just gotta eat right now

hugs
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Old 08-13-2015, 08:09 AM
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Good to hear from ya Rotz. I wish things were different, but love where your head is. Life is crazy - we deal with it in the best way we can for ourselves. Lots of empathy. If I were closer, I know we'd be great target shooting pals!
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Old 08-13-2015, 08:29 AM
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Originally Posted by firebolt View Post
Good to hear from ya Rotz. I wish things were different, but love where your head is. Life is crazy - we deal with it in the best way we can for ourselves. Lots of empathy. If I were closer, I know we'd be great target shooting pals!
Sweet! Wish we we're close! 20 yards...

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Old 08-13-2015, 08:34 AM
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Well guys... 4pm comes fast. Gotta get up, cook dinner n go work a 12. I'll see ya all soon. Don't kill your partners!
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Old 08-13-2015, 08:46 AM
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Damn, Box. Not the update I was hoping for. I'll never forget all that you both went through when he had his accident. Seems unbelievable that ANYONE would drink following an experience like that! (Logically I know better, but emotionally I'm still surprised all the time.)

I'm so, so sorry.

(on the positive side, that baby gets cuter every time you share her pics!! What a doll!!!)
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