Rev 3:16

So back to SR after some success, but more challenges. After a SERIOUS talk, wife agreed to just two glasses of wine a night. I believe she meant that with all her heart.

So as time has gone on, the glasses have gotten bigger--now about 8 ounces...up from traditional 4 ounce wine glass. But, still just two.

And then as time has gone on, a few beers during the day while painting a room--new old house with lots of projects. I'm finding the cans in the wastebasket.

So during the SERIOUS talk she said she'd cut back for me because it bothered me and she didn't want to see ME worried. Well, yes but what about you? Do it for your health. Nope she's not worried about that and would just as soon get blotto.

Wish I weren't here but glad to have the sounding board and good advice.

LexieCat

Sounds like a pretty familiar progression, Rev. Sorry to hear it but glad you're here.

You realize, don't you, that she CAN'T keep it to two small glasses of wine a night? And that it is bound to progress beyond where she was before?

hopeful4

Oh how I remember that. I just had "one" beer. Never mind it was 40 oz!

I am sorry.

firebolt

I didn't realize this AT ALL until I was here for a very long time. It never made sense to me that they couldn't control it. It still doesn't....but now I accept it.

Sorry you are here Rev - so far, the serious talks about drinking in my house have been meaningful to me only - which causes ME more harm than good. I stopped in order to take care of MY health

FireSprite

Sounds pretty textbook, increasing the serving size vs. the number of servings really feeds into the illusion of control. And then the progression to added drinking at odd times, "special" events, etc. Sorry you find yourself back at the beginning with this issue; it sounds like she's only interested in sobriety in an effort to make you happy but isn't concerned about it for herself. Is that enough for you?

I'm curious that you titled this thread about "successes" but then didn't mention any....?

ladyscribbler

I've seen novelty wine glasses that hold an entire bottle. I guess it's supposed to be funny, unless you've lived with an alcoholic, who would probably insist that it really was only one glass of wine. My ex used to fill a Big Gulp cup with vodka, add a splash of tea or Gatorade and call it "one drink."
16 oz. of wine is four servings, so she has doubled her consumption past the agreed upon limit, plus the daytime beers. Did you have a boundary in place for when that happened?

FindingMe2

It's always only 2 or a couple! Two what? Pitchers or bottles?

MIRecovery

Unfortunately moderation never has and never will work for the alcoholic.

I would recommend you checking out ALANON. You won't fix her but you will learn how to deal with an active alcoholic in your life