How Do I Help the Children with This? He's Selling the House
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
You know what Pippi, it took me a long time, but I had to finally come to the realization that I could not protect my children from their father's bad behavior. I can keep them physically safe. I can listen and help them, but their father is an a$$, and he always will be. I cannot protect them from getting hurt by him. Sadly, they have had to learn much too early in life what it means to be hurt by a narcissist, addicted, personality disordered, father. It's tragic.
What they do know is that I am there for them always, that I will do my best by them, and that our life will not stop just because of their father and his actions.
It's taken a lot of time, and a lot of counseling all around to get here, but we are in a better place, and so are you and your children.
You are going to be OK, so will they. Better than OK, you all have happiness in your futures!!! XXX
What they do know is that I am there for them always, that I will do my best by them, and that our life will not stop just because of their father and his actions.
It's taken a lot of time, and a lot of counseling all around to get here, but we are in a better place, and so are you and your children.
You are going to be OK, so will they. Better than OK, you all have happiness in your futures!!! XXX
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,038
Originally Posted by hopeful4 
You know what Pippi, it took me a long time, but I had to finally come to the realization that I could not protect my children from their father's bad behavior. I can keep them physically safe. I can listen and help them, but their father is an a$$, and he always will be. I cannot protect them from getting hurt by him. Sadly, they have had to learn much too early in life what it means to be hurt by a narcissist, addicted, personality disordered, father. It's tragic.
What they do know is that I am there for them always, that I will do my best by them, and that our life will not stop just because of their father and his actions.
It's taken a lot of time, and a lot of counseling all around to get here, but we are in a better place, and so are you and your children.
You are going to be OK, so will they. Better than OK, you all have happiness in your futures!!! XXX
What they do know is that I am there for them always, that I will do my best by them, and that our life will not stop just because of their father and his actions.
It's taken a lot of time, and a lot of counseling all around to get here, but we are in a better place, and so are you and your children.
You are going to be OK, so will they. Better than OK, you all have happiness in your futures!!! XXX
So more and more I have left him to do what he will and while he hurts the children, now they can see more clearly what the underlying dynamics are. Which helps them see my position. And then they can trust me.
This is all good so long as he doesn't do worse stuff...but no future tripping here!
You know what the thought of her dad selling the house is like to DD8? She said it's as bad as having to throw up every 2 seconds. To which DS12 corrected, 'no, every 2 minutes'. And DD8 concluded, 'it's as though your whole life becomes a toilet'.
And then we laughed.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
It will become easier for them. While they had good times there, they also had a lot of trauma associated with him and that home. Maybe a fresh start will be a good think in the future. There is a choice, to look on the bright side, or to wallow in the pain. While you can work through the pain with them, knowing that the bright side is there is what they will hang on to.
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