Made an enormous mistake... help
Look, he is a manipulator. He is playing with you and your feelings. These are little mind games. And yea, you made a mistake, but honestly, I thought when I read the topic title that you actually got back with him or something. Now that is what I would call a mistake.
Basically, what he does is he throws the bait, people see it, they inform you, it affects your feelings, and you get upset. And he feeds on that. And it is a cycle. No contact breaks the cycle. Please do explain this to your brother. I am sure he means well and wants all the best for you. But only an absolute isolation/NC will help.
Basically, what he does is he throws the bait, people see it, they inform you, it affects your feelings, and you get upset. And he feeds on that. And it is a cycle. No contact breaks the cycle. Please do explain this to your brother. I am sure he means well and wants all the best for you. But only an absolute isolation/NC will help.
Yes... I shouldn't have messaged him I basically led him to a place where he could walk all over me again...
But well... Thanks for your response.
Face Book is a terrific, free PR tool.
There is a competitor in my market whose FB is very active. She has over 1,000 likes on her business page. She has only been open in her business for 9 months. I keep up with my competitors and what they are doing. Now is a slow time in my market I keep saying to my husband "Damn, I need to figure out what nitch she has going on"! Here's her nitch....she is working as a nanny while trying to launch her business. She is not busy. Her Fake Book (haha I love that!) is presenting to others a very active and successful business. I don't blame her its common to do, yet I find myself often reeled in to Fake Book an believing what it says because I don't use it that way. Then again I have been in business 20 years so it isn't comparable. My husband never falls for it he said the whole time her postings were fake.
Get my point? Who goes on FB and says "Good morning world! I am an alcoholic and I abused my Ex. She is a fantastic person and I am not. Have a pleasant day"!
He is just spinning a yarn and poking the bear at the same time. He accomplished his goal - you responded. He can post whatever he wants, he can say whatever he wants. It doesn't change who he really is and you know better. Stop responding and eventually the game will become boring to him and he will move on.
There is a competitor in my market whose FB is very active. She has over 1,000 likes on her business page. She has only been open in her business for 9 months. I keep up with my competitors and what they are doing. Now is a slow time in my market I keep saying to my husband "Damn, I need to figure out what nitch she has going on"! Here's her nitch....she is working as a nanny while trying to launch her business. She is not busy. Her Fake Book (haha I love that!) is presenting to others a very active and successful business. I don't blame her its common to do, yet I find myself often reeled in to Fake Book an believing what it says because I don't use it that way. Then again I have been in business 20 years so it isn't comparable. My husband never falls for it he said the whole time her postings were fake.
Get my point? Who goes on FB and says "Good morning world! I am an alcoholic and I abused my Ex. She is a fantastic person and I am not. Have a pleasant day"!
He is just spinning a yarn and poking the bear at the same time. He accomplished his goal - you responded. He can post whatever he wants, he can say whatever he wants. It doesn't change who he really is and you know better. Stop responding and eventually the game will become boring to him and he will move on.
You are right. I will not contact him again. Hopefully he will get bored... Thank you
I think one important factor to remind ourselves about with social media is it’s generational. And to some generations it’s their everything and basic forms for communication.
My generation things were more personal, face to face, actually talking on the phone.
Current generation’s communication is email, text messages and postings on social media. Not very personal to us but it is to them.
When I go out to dinner with my kids I want eye to eye contact and conversation. My kids are in their 20’s so my rule is phones go on vibrate and face down on the table. The first person that picks up their phone also will pick up the check!!!! Lol
My generation things were more personal, face to face, actually talking on the phone.
Current generation’s communication is email, text messages and postings on social media. Not very personal to us but it is to them.
When I go out to dinner with my kids I want eye to eye contact and conversation. My kids are in their 20’s so my rule is phones go on vibrate and face down on the table. The first person that picks up their phone also will pick up the check!!!! Lol
As for my exabf, yep, he loves to bully people via Internet and social media. Exes, friends, people he doesn't even know... And so on... But he is more cruel with exes...
He used to post things about how "dirty" and without any morals or integrity his cheating ex was.. Yet he slept with her every time we broke up.
Maybe even before. So... Ugh.
He used to post things about how "dirty" and without any morals or integrity his cheating ex was.. Yet he slept with her every time we broke up.
I think if my kids left their cell phones home and came out to eat with me, my first reaction would be "ok, did you lose your phone again?" hahahaha
Enjoy your time with your mom!!!!
Yea, enjoy your time, timetoheal! Not having a phone or any touch with social media is sometimes a blessing.
Two hours ago, inspired by your thread, I took myself off FakeBook. Could not physically stand my AH thumbing up every single picture I posted . . . yes, AFTER the move. Le puke. The less he knows, the better. If he knows nothing, the best.
BTW, I think that manipulative people and manipulation have always existed, but somehow social medial can really be a great manipulation tool, because there is huge audience, it is easy to lie, and manipulators hide behind the screen, making up this imaginary persona. Fake reality. Despicable and dangerous for potential victims.
Two hours ago, inspired by your thread, I took myself off FakeBook. Could not physically stand my AH thumbing up every single picture I posted . . . yes, AFTER the move. Le puke. The less he knows, the better. If he knows nothing, the best.
BTW, I think that manipulative people and manipulation have always existed, but somehow social medial can really be a great manipulation tool, because there is huge audience, it is easy to lie, and manipulators hide behind the screen, making up this imaginary persona. Fake reality. Despicable and dangerous for potential victims.
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