unease7

do all addicts /alcoholics do this? Become very withdrawn from family sit around on computer doing nothing or watching tv all day /sleeping all day totally un motivated when I get home from work the garbage cans are literally over flowing there is dirty laundry or clean laundry piles ever where mail that he brings in and throws in a massive pile on table that is when he actually checks the mail box which is rare. It's just like he has no personality ️just blah and even when he does say something it's usually sarcastic remarks making fun off the people on tv he's so negative and just sucks the fun out of any and everything and he doesn't really seem to care about anything he doesn't even shower regularly and has missed work again recently due to over sleeping I don't know I was just wanting to hear some of your experiences with this ??

hopeful4

Are you married to my X husband??

This is pretty par for the course for many addicts. My X lost his job, while it was not b/c of drinking, I am sure his spotty behavior at work contributed to him not being chosen to stay when they had a buyout. He is also a narcissist a$$ who only sees the worst in everyone, except his royal self LOL.

I am sorry. Focus on you and what you need to do for a happy and healthy life.

SparkleKitty

Sounds about right.

unease7

A lot of what he watches on TV is cartoons and and its like how are you suppose to have a conversation or even make small talk with a person like this I thought I married an adult but I am seeing that the farther he goes on this path he is own the less and less we have in common

AnvilheadII

so when YOU get home from work do you run around and pick up all his messes? empty the trash, round up the dirty laundry, or put the clean laundry away, sort thru the mail, pay the bills, and then cook dinner? because the more YOU do, the less he has to.

I realize living in a messy/filthy house is NO FUN and I personally can't do it. but is this really any way for YOU to live? to have your home, your HAVEN so disrespected? is that how you would treat someone's home?

you deserve a peaceful tidy environment. you deserve a PARTNER who does his share, who goes to work (gasp), and who treats your home like a palace. and who puts HYGIENE high up on the priority scale. if he wants to live in swill maybe he needs his own place???

maybear

Sounds like my husband. As his addiction got worse, his hygiene went down the drain. No motivation, didn't do much around the house. Lazy. Late nights. Finally he lost his job.

Hard to know what comes first, depression that leads to alcohol or alcohol that leads to depression.

Bern

Yep, that definitely sounds like depression. Sounds like he's in a dark place right now. As Anvil said, the more you do, the easier it is for him to remain in that state.

Are you or have you communicated to him that you are concerned about his behavior?