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Location: Nova Scotia
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I've read all the posts to which I too can completely relate. It seems everyone has left the relationship with the person addicted. Does this always have to be the case. Is there ever any other Hope. My former partner and I had been apart for 2 yrs. I've never gotten over him. 2 months ago we started talking again and decided we would try again. We live in different provinces. He flew me up for a visit last month and I've been the happiest I've been in a very very long time. 5 days ago he said he would never give up alcohol and weed permanently. I was crushed and immediately told him goodbye. I've been devastated ever since. I feel lost and confused and don't know how to find balance.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Hi, New,
This is a very old thread (from 2011), so maybe you'd like to start a new one so people can see your post more easily.
In answer to your question, I know of no way a relationship can truly be successful with an alcoholic who is not ready to quit drinking. Alcoholism is inevitably progressive, so even if you can bear it at the level it is right now, it is unlikely to STAY at that level. You've broken up, I'd suggest doing some work on yourself so you can move past this relationship.
This is a very old thread (from 2011), so maybe you'd like to start a new one so people can see your post more easily.
In answer to your question, I know of no way a relationship can truly be successful with an alcoholic who is not ready to quit drinking. Alcoholism is inevitably progressive, so even if you can bear it at the level it is right now, it is unlikely to STAY at that level. You've broken up, I'd suggest doing some work on yourself so you can move past this relationship.
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Join Date: Jun 2015
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Thank u for reply. I have no idea how to start a new thread. I'm not tech savvy and having a hard time navigating the site. I've been trying to work on myself for 2 yrs thru various groups, counsellors and psychologists. I'm not sure where the resistance is. Intellectually I know I have to stay away hence ending it immediately. I can even step back and see how it will never change but emotionally I'm truly struggling
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Just click here: Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information and at the top left you will see a button that says, "New Thread."
As far as your emotional struggling, keep reading and posting here, and you might consider Al-Anon, too. It's good for anyone affected by someone else's drinking, whether that person is still in your life or not.
As far as your emotional struggling, keep reading and posting here, and you might consider Al-Anon, too. It's good for anyone affected by someone else's drinking, whether that person is still in your life or not.
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Join Date: Feb 2007
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At least he told you straight up that he wouldn't rather tHan lie to you to keep you hooked in.
Originally Posted by New2015 
I've read all the posts to which I too can completely relate. It seems everyone has left the relationship with the person addicted. Does this always have to be the case. Is there ever any other Hope. My former partner and I had been apart for 2 yrs. I've never gotten over him. 2 months ago we started talking again and decided we would try again. We live in different provinces. He flew me up for a visit last month and I've been the happiest I've been in a very very long time. 5 days ago he said he would never give up alcohol and weed permanently. I was crushed and immediately told him goodbye. I've been devastated ever since. I feel lost and confused and don't know how to find balance.
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