kelleyw9292

AH is home and doing really well. Things are going well! But I am feeling a bit of resentment- it's a Friday. I want some wine! Grrrrr!!!! It's incredibly irritating that because of HIS issues, *I* can't ever drink again on a Friday night. Just venting, thanks for listening!

biminiblue

If you are that upset about it, maybe look at that.

It shouldn't be difficult for you to give up if you don't have a problem yourself with alcohol. If you are a normal drinker, at some point he is going to be okay with being around it. It's just really difficult in the beginning and he will need your support for a while. Ask him if he minds if you have a glass.

LexieCat

When I was newly sober, I wanted all alcohol OUT of the house. I live alone, but I kept it OUT of the house when my then-partners were newly sober. The one who stayed that way has thanked me for it several times.

If you feel like unwinding with a glass of wine, why not go out with your friends, have one, and come home?

kelleyw9292

Oh, I definitely won't have it in the house! Don't worry! And it's so much better for me too, to not drink. It hasn't been a problem- I haven't had a drop since he first went to detox (3 weeks) and haven't missed it at all (until now). It's just been a looooong week and I need to find a different way to unwind!

ladyscribbler

Can you get to an Alanon meeting? I also find a nice hot cup of chamomile tea with a spoonful of honey very relaxing in the evening, especially after a long day.

freetosmile

I too enjoy a beer every now and then and also have had some resentmerts in the past about not being "able" to because of HIS addiction......

I got over it. No biggie- you find other ways to "enjoy the evening".....

But I get what your saying.

kelleyw9292

I do need to find an Alanon meeting- I totally do. I like the tea idea too, thanks! I am overall really loving not drinking- It's a relief to have the choice taken away. I usually only drank on Fridays and Saturdays but even then, it was when to have the first one and how many to have and whether it was worth the calories/carbs.......a relief to have it gone and not think about it at all.

totfit

My wife drinks a glass or two of wine most every night and never stopped for me. I on occasion resented it from time to time, but it did not make me drink. "I" make me drink. You should be able to have wine if you want.

firebolt

With me - it would be more the feeling of I "can't" do something than that i would really want one. THAT would get to me. And I could guess that it would mostly be stemming from lingering anger and resentment for dealing with alcoholism and the effects of it for so long. Alanon - a great idea!!

kelleyw9292

Yes this!!!

My husband would be totally fine with me having some wine- he never drank wine anyway- but I'm going to try not to. At least for quite a while.

Hangnbyathread

^^^This right here^^^^. You are not the one with a drinking problem. He is. While it may sound noble to show support to not drink. Next it will be well I don't think I should go out and drink, because he would resent that, followed by, then I can't go out because he may think I'm drinking...etc etc etc. He has to be the one stronger than the alcohol.

You're life isn't out of control if you drink.....only when he does.

kelleyw9292

You're absolutely right! Thank you so much!