Amends to the group
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 588
Amends to the group
one of my many issues at this time is insomnia. I try to make it work for me by watching educational/ spiritual vids. I stayed up last night watching ones on forgiveness. I have let so much anger and resentment from my xabf set in that I have become harsh and judgmental. Several of you dear ones are FF/recovery and I have said some pretty awful things about addicts and my attitude about guys in recovery.
For this I am truly sorry for being offensive and insensitive. I'm on my own road of eating disorder recovery and have had my share of wrong headed assumptions about that issues. I am working on being mindful of snap judgements and have decided to actually start working a bit with the teen challenge group in my area as a way to help people along the way. It's really no more than helping collect donations when they're in front of the grocery store. maybe a little cleaning and giving rides once my car is back on the road. To the FF I wish you all the strength and peace in the world
For this I am truly sorry for being offensive and insensitive. I'm on my own road of eating disorder recovery and have had my share of wrong headed assumptions about that issues. I am working on being mindful of snap judgements and have decided to actually start working a bit with the teen challenge group in my area as a way to help people along the way. It's really no more than helping collect donations when they're in front of the grocery store. maybe a little cleaning and giving rides once my car is back on the road. To the FF I wish you all the strength and peace in the world
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Apology accepted. Yeah, I noticed that you slung a bit of mud in the general vicinity of addicts/alcoholics, but I get where you're coming from. Sometimes it does feel like life would be simpler if we were all shipped off to a remote island somewhere, but the world would then be missing the contributions of so many awesome people who have recovered.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 273
I think most of us in recovery that have stuck around "this side" of the fence for any length of time develop a thick skin or we don't stick around long. I understand that nobody posts on a forum like this because life is going peachy. This is a safe place for people to get support in times of great trouble. Its a place to say things you can't anywhere else and I get that and I keep that in mind as I read.
That said as Lexiecat said there are a lot of people who have made the world a much richer place and were alcoholics. Here's a list I just stole off the internet of a few:
Ulysses S. Grant
Alexander the Great
Winston Churchill
Ernest Hemingway
Vincent Van Gogh
Buzz Aldrin
Stephen King
Robin Williams
William Shatner
Orson Welles
I think the contribution these folks have made to the world would be sorely missed. Also keep in mind that there is a whole world of people that you won't see here that are recovering. Many of us in recovery are struggling with the exact same issues you are. I can't even tell you how many times I will visit my women's recovery forum and see women with titles of threads almost exactly the same as what I see here. We struggle with stress, inconsiderate people, anger issues from people that are NOT alcoholics. I will say that from the group I am in there are a TON of us that didn't develop issues with addiction until midlife. A divorce, an aging parent needing assistance, or a host of other issues can set people off the edge admittedly through unhealthy coping mechanisms. That said there are a lot of us that are genuinely remorseful, never meant to make your lives a living nightmare, and slog through sobriety the best we can. Every day in my recovery group I see another posting from somebody announcing a year, two years, five years sobriety.
I don't mean to defend or excuse addiction in any way and I understand people here are angry for good reasons. I did however want to give you my two cents from a different lens. If you haven't attended an open AA meeting go to one. Your loved one may never get sober and for that I am sorry. There are those that will and we endeavor in our own way to make the world a better place.
Peace,
Cookies
That said as Lexiecat said there are a lot of people who have made the world a much richer place and were alcoholics. Here's a list I just stole off the internet of a few:
Ulysses S. Grant
Alexander the Great
Winston Churchill
Ernest Hemingway
Vincent Van Gogh
Buzz Aldrin
Stephen King
Robin Williams
William Shatner
Orson Welles
I think the contribution these folks have made to the world would be sorely missed. Also keep in mind that there is a whole world of people that you won't see here that are recovering. Many of us in recovery are struggling with the exact same issues you are. I can't even tell you how many times I will visit my women's recovery forum and see women with titles of threads almost exactly the same as what I see here. We struggle with stress, inconsiderate people, anger issues from people that are NOT alcoholics. I will say that from the group I am in there are a TON of us that didn't develop issues with addiction until midlife. A divorce, an aging parent needing assistance, or a host of other issues can set people off the edge admittedly through unhealthy coping mechanisms. That said there are a lot of us that are genuinely remorseful, never meant to make your lives a living nightmare, and slog through sobriety the best we can. Every day in my recovery group I see another posting from somebody announcing a year, two years, five years sobriety.
I don't mean to defend or excuse addiction in any way and I understand people here are angry for good reasons. I did however want to give you my two cents from a different lens. If you haven't attended an open AA meeting go to one. Your loved one may never get sober and for that I am sorry. There are those that will and we endeavor in our own way to make the world a better place.
Peace,
Cookies
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,476
That's pretty big of you Ducky girl.
Well done
Alcoholic folk have feelings too, pretty strong and intense ones actually (which is a massive part of the drinking actually, pain extinguisher)
But from the outside looking in, it probably doesn't look that way.
Thanks again
Well done
Alcoholic folk have feelings too, pretty strong and intense ones actually (which is a massive part of the drinking actually, pain extinguisher)
But from the outside looking in, it probably doesn't look that way.
Thanks again
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
I think the focus of the F&F forum is not just flinging mud at the A, although that happens, but supporting those who have to live with them.
Sometimes it's hard to distinguish the A from their behaviour.
Sometimes it's hard to distinguish the A from their behaviour.
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