Liveitwell

What Hopeful said is 10000% true. They will give you enough to get you hooked back in and you'll think "finally, this time it's real change and it's genuine"...only that lasts for a few weeks. I had the exact same experience as Hopeful with my ex. Be very wary of him.

thousandwords53

Thank you all. I need to remind myself to slow down, let things be. Take our time and talk when the time is right.

The only link I sent him was the first one. I think he is just lonely and up late and trying to feel helpful/in control/ figure out what I need. ..without actually addressing HIS issues.

I truly believe his intentions are coming from a good place. Not a sober place, or a place of awareness, but good nonetheless.

LexieCat

I dunno, I think they are coming from a place of denial and manipulation. He's still turning this around on YOU--how YOU are breaking up the family. I don't think there's any need (much less any point) to straighten him out on it. He won't get it, and it will only exhaust and frustrate you.

redatlanta

That article was interesting. I did feel like I should be eating a bag of popcorn while perusing it - very much like watching a movie with horrible acting, and you can't take your eyes off it.

I have heard divorce referred to as many things but I can't recall "immature" ever being a label attached to one.

As you have only separated a week with no intentions at this time to divorce would seem he jumped the gun.

I personally wouldn't respond, he showed up to a gun fight with a wet noodle.

steve11694

Divorce is immature and selfish. Don?t do it. | Penelope Trunk Careers translated into alcoholic language =

Me , me, me dont want to lose my caretaker and enabler

Refiner

"It's a cold lonely place in life but better than the alternative" says that author about her own marriage. Hahahahahahaha what a factless, baseless fantasy story she's blogging.

healthyagain

Oh, please . . .

Divorce is selfish, and alcoholism and abuse are exactly what?

Don't send him articles, it is honestly pointless. And do not read his crap either. And you actually can expect some mind-blowing accusations. The more you detach, the worse they get. And you moved out . . . so . . .

bird13

I love how you sent him a relevant article and he said, " I'll read it later." (As in never.) And then sends you this. . . Main theme here: ME ME ME .. POOR ME. I used to get so frustrated with this. Deflection, side shows, pointing at everything else.

Doesn't that ever get exhausting for them ? Sometimes I wonder.

thousandwords53

Yes I am sure he never even read the article. It frustrates me. The only reason I sent the link in the first place was because my communication skills are so shot from being rejected my him. I do much better with written words.
I'm a good week into this separation and I am much more on the "I can do this " wagon vs "I feel terrible for doing this" wagon.

A second botched kiddo transfer of the week.
Him driving the kids through my new town so they could point out what road we live on.
And him telling me he would sign paperwork (finally) but didn't agree to paying spousal maintenance. I really just need child support to kick in because I have $12 to my name.
The above are just some bullet points to keep me on track. I know this is SR and not "divorce court recovery " but I really appreciate having this forum to dump all my thoughts into!

waggin

Wow, this article proves ANYONE, including an ignorant, negative, misguided person, can author "articles" on the internet. Scary to think that anyone might perceive this to be a source to consider for serious reasons. Oh my gosh. Thanks, Internet! Yuck I couldn't even get through the first "point" in her list of reasons.
Hang in there, Thousand. We're here to listen! ;-)