LemonGirl

Just an update. February 2nd I had decided to not drink any more alcohol for myself as it just seems to have been the reason for so much turmoil and chaos and pain in my life and the lives of many of my loved ones... not that I had an addiction, however, I did feel that awful unhealthy attraction to it.

So.... My update is that so far so good! It has been 30 days today. I have also gotten back into jogging and exercising and eating right, and I have dropped nine pounds of the 30 I had put on while being unhealthy with my xabf. In fact, he has been telling me that my eating habits are now rubbing off on him and he is eating eggs for breakfast with sliced tomatoes. Lol...

Poor guy is still drinking, however. He says he isn't seeing any results for having tried to eat right. I poked fun and mentioned the calories in alcohol. He just agreed. It was lighthearted.

So yeah... I also managed to beef up my resume by applying for a my official permit and found out I am qualified for three levels above what I am working now (vague for privacy purposes), and once I get the permit I can start applying for better work and hopefully move out of my alcoholic mother's house. (that one I still feel absolutely awful about! Oh the guilt from a mother! ugh!)

Things are going good =) Still miss my xabf. Still in contact. He is still struggling to get sober. And emotionally I am doing good. So for now, that's still okay...

So glad to have this site to spill to!

robgt350

good for you lemon girl
yea i also started to eat healthy but still working on exercising. but loosing that weight is a god since of accomplishment i bet? good for you. congrats on your soberity!

maia1234

LG- GIRL POWER!!! look how your life is changing. Giving up the power that you spent on him and working on yourself, you are thriving!!

Congrats and good luck on the new job search!!

Stung

What a positive update!! I'm happy that things are going well for you!

schnappi99

I stopped drinking alcohol for much the same reason LG- though I have had one or two over the last year or so when hanging out with my brother. Feels pretty nice to not have hangovers, wake up with pretty much the same head I went to bed with. Early on I stopped in solidarity w/ RAW but I started thinking I didn't know what my relationship w/ booze amounted to. As it happens I don't think about it much.. maybe miss the date-night glass of wine w/ dinner but thats forgotten after the meal.

I'm cutting out gluten and processed sugar, with a view towards omitting carbs in general. Feels great a few weeks in but man I am a junkie wrt cookies etc... the first week was pretty hard, reaching for an apple or clementine or lunchmeat instead of the oreos or her chocolate or donuts. Even now I keep a stash of apples and oranges, do not want that drawer in the fridge to run empty! Sometimes I have had 4 or more a night...

LemonGirl

Hey Schnappi! Now health I can talk about! I use a low starch and low sugar diet. NOT low carb, because I try to get as many veggies in as possible, and allow myself an apple every day, and sometimes a banana and some berries in my protein shake. What I have learned is that your brain needs sugar, first of all, but we are usually so overloaded in our diets, we need to correct how the body processes different fuels in order to tap into the right resource. So... FAT! Fat is probably the best way to fuel the body! The problem is that most people eat too many carbs, and so, when the body has fat and carbs, the fat gets stored as fat (first), then the body breaks down the carbs into sugar for energy, and whatever is left-over, is also stored as fat. When you cut out the sugar and carb and/starch nonsense, your body can begin to utilize fat for energy. Also, high protein helps that process. Anyway, we are all different in how the ratio of carb/fat/protein lines up. But alcohol is like a sugar in the body. Not to mention the dehydrating effects it has on the body. Which is why drinking a TON of water everyday helps with weight loss and weight maintenance.

You know, it's funny... Because I was jogging and at a good weight for a very long time before I met my xabf. And he was supposed to join me in that effort. Turns out I was just as weak and joined him in his shenanigans more often than we ventured in mine. How's that for a codie being unable to say NO! and set healthy boundaries! Ha!

Anyway, I think it's great that you assessed your relationship with alcohol. I came to the same conclusions (obviously). It's just more negative than it ever has been any fun.

schnappi99

More negative than fun is kind of how I'm looking at it too. For quite a while I had been thinking that being able to drink a lot was some kind of virtue- I remember as a late teen thinking that I'd rather be around drinkers & stoners because thats where the fun was. Sure, it was at the time but I do recall people drifting away from the stuff and me thinking "their loss" and it had its costs for me too. Yeah that stuff was fun in the 18-20's but not so much in the 40's.

OTOH booze never gave me "the fix" so not drinking wasn't a big deal & I haven't smoked weed for getting on 30 years- I get my fix with emotional/physical intimacy and that is proving more challenging... Could be back then the booze and pot helped get the fix more easily, so I partook freely. OTOH I was listening to some marijuana anonymous recordings the other day, I got a laugh by how relaxed & chill those speakers were compared to AA/naranon speakers where you can hear the edge in their voice- the sure knowledge of whats lurking out in the dark away from the campfire- the MA speaker commented on how tolerant and accepting stoners are in general- that was some of the attraction too.

Nowadays I'm happy to be done with all that. When my ego gets on me about wasted opportunities I get to thinking what complications might have arisen if I had taken advantage of them.

LemonGirl

I am working on the emotional/ physical attraction too. And yes far more tricky!