smm264

Yes, Codejob, I am afraid of being taken advantage of. I am afraid of being hurt again. it's complicated. I'm coming to terms with the fact that he was addicted to porn. I knew about this one...I let it go because it was looking, not touching, even though it was clearly out of hand and I was obviously in denial, and it obviously progressed. His psychiatrist has him going to SA meetings as well as AA.

I could handle being married to an alcoholic in recovery. I don't know that I want to be married to a sex addict, in recovery or not. Addiction involves cravings. I accept that he will crave alcohol and deny the cravings as part of his program. I know how stubborn he is and I know how serious he is about recovery. I do believe he will stay sober. But if recovery from sex addiction follows the same course, I cannot accept him having "cravings" for other women that he is coping with. I realize now that in order for me to feel safe here, I need to know that lust for other women isn't an issue. And every time the SA comes up in counseling, I go into angry lizard brain.

I am realizing that I need to schedule some independent counseling sessions to deal with this. I will schedule that today.

And I also realized I haven't said thank you to all of you! This is such a wonderful group. It's been so helpful to have a place to go for support! God bless you all!

CodeJob

SMM, you are dealing with a multi-pronged addiction.

It is your line to draw. Do not let your H draw it or you'll have a lifetime of resentments.