50 Shades of Grey - A Psychiatrist's Letter to Young People
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I have no intention to go see this movie either, ( it will come to cable sooner than later) i was merely pointing out that it isnt any different than the other movies released. James Bond is successful and powerful with "bond girl" in every movie for the last 30 years.
Its just dressed up a little different for 50 s. But i think its getting so much press because its bringing the taboo front and center along with the new author/ new actors and wide audiences of women...Hollywood is pouncing all over this angle.
Same as it did with old Edward and Bella, they lasted a few years, but now i dont know if they are doing any different movies.
Jaynie you should be given extra cudos for your efforts, i'm sure you were swimming against the current in that old boys club.
Its just dressed up a little different for 50 s. But i think its getting so much press because its bringing the taboo front and center along with the new author/ new actors and wide audiences of women...Hollywood is pouncing all over this angle.
Same as it did with old Edward and Bella, they lasted a few years, but now i dont know if they are doing any different movies.
Jaynie you should be given extra cudos for your efforts, i'm sure you were swimming against the current in that old boys club.
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Originally Posted by Fandy 
I read all 3 books.....it was entertaining as my ankle was sprained and I needed to remain off my feet. I'm secure in that no one is going to take advantage of me and attempt to abuse me because of this.
I don't understand how so many can comment so strongly and start a thread about it if you haven't read it...????
it is fantasy, nothing more. I did not read any deep evil meaning into it. anymore than I did those romance novels I read many years ago. (the lip biting annoyed me too).
I would not recommend this for a younger set, but most people that will see it will see it for what it is, a simple common fantasy fairy tale. Not anymore realistic than Spiderman or Cinderella, I never found any "deep meaning" of abuse in it....I believe that the books mean to set Anastasia as the one with control FWIW.
I know this opinion is not popular, so I won't comment further, but as a woman who is a secure adult, I didn't find it any more damaging than the classic " Deep Throat". However, many years later, we find out that the actress was manipulated for that performance.
hopefully these actors were not.
I don't understand how so many can comment so strongly and start a thread about it if you haven't read it...????
it is fantasy, nothing more. I did not read any deep evil meaning into it. anymore than I did those romance novels I read many years ago. (the lip biting annoyed me too).
I would not recommend this for a younger set, but most people that will see it will see it for what it is, a simple common fantasy fairy tale. Not anymore realistic than Spiderman or Cinderella, I never found any "deep meaning" of abuse in it....I believe that the books mean to set Anastasia as the one with control FWIW.
I know this opinion is not popular, so I won't comment further, but as a woman who is a secure adult, I didn't find it any more damaging than the classic " Deep Throat". However, many years later, we find out that the actress was manipulated for that performance.
hopefully these actors were not.
Movies depict all kinds of things. Its entertainment. I snuck in to see "flashdance" when I was underage. It didn't make me want to be a stripper it only made me want to cut the shoulder off my sweatshirts.
If someone is into BDSM they are into it - watching a movie isn't going to 'make" someone decide to try it if the desire for it isn't already there. Hence I won't be seeing it. Seen one seen em all.
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
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Originally Posted by redatlanta
Movies depict all kinds of things. Its entertainment. I snuck in to see "flashdance" when I was underage. It didn't make me want to be a stripper it only made me want to cut the shoulder off my sweatshirts.
.
What interesting, is the extent to which these book took off like wildfire. There was an SNL parody that just about made me fall down I laughed so hard.
Things got decidedly less funny when my 80 year old mother read the trilogy.
....And wanted to discuss it....
******{shudder}}}}
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oh that is funny.....I do not think my daughter wants to discuss it with me either (she's 34)...I get that icky-sicky feeling when she and her husband fight in front of me and she brings up their physical sexual relationship just to embarrass him.
Jumping on the bandwagon is BMW, there is a commercial where the husband and wife are driving and his mama is in the 3 row of seating in the fancy BMW SUV with the leather interior...."Your grandfather loved it when I wore leather, he was a very dominant man"....the man who is in front gets a look from the wife and yells MOM!!! she answers with "well I am 80 years old.... I think it is a direct hit on the movie. but it is FUNNY. here it is.... "pick up the pace"
http://youtu.be/pNJ6TD2u5S0
Jumping on the bandwagon is BMW, there is a commercial where the husband and wife are driving and his mama is in the 3 row of seating in the fancy BMW SUV with the leather interior...."Your grandfather loved it when I wore leather, he was a very dominant man"....the man who is in front gets a look from the wife and yells MOM!!! she answers with "well I am 80 years old.... I think it is a direct hit on the movie. but it is FUNNY. here it is.... "pick up the pace"
http://youtu.be/pNJ6TD2u5S0
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Sorry about the not-G-rated material -- but let me summarize the main point I wanted to get across from the blog in the link that was removed:
What people do in the bedroom is between two consenting adults. That's not the reviewers main beef with this movie.
But the movie depicts controlling, emotional abuse in a positive light -- as something men should want to do to women and something women should want to have done to them: A wealthy man selling your car and buying you another that he then GPS-tracks to keep tabs on where you go, a man who tells you what you can wear, who you can associate with, what you can eat -- this is abuse, and has nothing to do with love and depicting it as something desirable is disturbing.
What people do in the bedroom is between two consenting adults. That's not the reviewers main beef with this movie.
But the movie depicts controlling, emotional abuse in a positive light -- as something men should want to do to women and something women should want to have done to them: A wealthy man selling your car and buying you another that he then GPS-tracks to keep tabs on where you go, a man who tells you what you can wear, who you can associate with, what you can eat -- this is abuse, and has nothing to do with love and depicting it as something desirable is disturbing.
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I just read that this movie is already the 2nd biggest weekend blockbuster since "Passion of the Christ"....and, the weekend isn't even over.
I guess this just illustrates that sex sells. Sex, plus Hollywood hipe, sells BIG!
dandylion
I guess this just illustrates that sex sells. Sex, plus Hollywood hipe, sells BIG!
dandylion
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yes, I read that it is boasting 90 million in sales for this weekend....
the marketing and the weather, next they will charting how many Christian and Anastasia Grey babies were conceived this weekend.
In France the age to watch it in theaters is 12.
the marketing and the weather, next they will charting how many Christian and Anastasia Grey babies were conceived this weekend.
In France the age to watch it in theaters is 12.
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I read the first book because I was interested in the topic, but never finished. I was very disappointed with the quality and story. I would rather read Henry Miller anytime -- not precisely similar, but I think he had both the experience and the talent to convey stuff an lifestyle that is unconventional.
I personally absolutely get why people jump on this type of material -- like it was said above, the intrigue of fantasy, the unusual... We all have hidden or not-so-hidden weird things in our interests and imagination, but the majority never feels comfortable to express/explore themselves, so read and watch it.
There is a book that I really liked, it's not a fantasy novel like 50 shades, but a more realistic and multi-faceted exploration of this world. Sexual Outsiders by David Ortmann.
I personally absolutely get why people jump on this type of material -- like it was said above, the intrigue of fantasy, the unusual... We all have hidden or not-so-hidden weird things in our interests and imagination, but the majority never feels comfortable to express/explore themselves, so read and watch it.
There is a book that I really liked, it's not a fantasy novel like 50 shades, but a more realistic and multi-faceted exploration of this world. Sexual Outsiders by David Ortmann.
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I really liked that blog post Lillamy and I m glad I read it before it got removed I did not find it offensive or racy at all. Thank you.
Well, if nothing else, this thread inspired me to change my avatar
Well, if nothing else, this thread inspired me to change my avatar
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It's interesting that a book/movie like this provokes such intense moralistic and other types of debates because it has a sexual theme, while books and films depicting (often extreme) violence of other kinds no longer raise much attention and sensitivity, they have become "normal" part of contemporary culture. Not surprising and we can see the same bias of sensitivity everywhere (the skew is naturally rooted in human nature and development, I think). Just always interesting to see it.
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intense moralistic and other types of debates because it has a sexual theme
Which, you know, is the only reason to discuss the movie here. That there are too many of us who have lived that hell. And trust me, it's anything but "hot" and there's not a thing that's "moralistic" about being vehemently opposed to abusive relationships -- and entertainment that glorifies them.
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I think that women are a LOT smarter than you are giving them credit for.
We go to movies for entertainment and enjoyment, it's not *dangerous*. What is "hot" for some is not for others....I think that believing women are that shallow is discrediting, along with the younger women...the women who are so concerned about their daughters would be surprised if they actually got an honest answer from them, but they do not want to discuss with the mommies anymore than you or I want to discuss the sexual aspect with your 80- year old mamas.
it's a sexual fantasy, nothing more....(and most doctors will tell you, it's a common theme) and this is NOTHING new. I do remember watching the Story of O which was extremely abusive BDSM and although that is nothing I practice, it *enhanced* the bedroom for a bit....
whatever you practice, I hope you all respect yourselves.
We go to movies for entertainment and enjoyment, it's not *dangerous*. What is "hot" for some is not for others....I think that believing women are that shallow is discrediting, along with the younger women...the women who are so concerned about their daughters would be surprised if they actually got an honest answer from them, but they do not want to discuss with the mommies anymore than you or I want to discuss the sexual aspect with your 80- year old mamas.
it's a sexual fantasy, nothing more....(and most doctors will tell you, it's a common theme) and this is NOTHING new. I do remember watching the Story of O which was extremely abusive BDSM and although that is nothing I practice, it *enhanced* the bedroom for a bit....
whatever you practice, I hope you all respect yourselves.
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FIFTY SHADES OF GREY BY PAM AYRES
The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;...
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.
In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"
Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!
The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;...
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.
In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"
Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!
Bunnies!
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Actually, I've seen more women commenting on "the love story" and how they miss that man who "if he'd only given me a chance, I could have saved him" than anyone with a realistic view of abuse. This movie is going to cause lots and lots of damage.
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Location: Florida
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Originally Posted by Thumper
Anne Rice's 'Sleeping Beauty' trilogy apparently makes 50 Shades seem tame in comparison and they are making that into a cable TV Series.
I did read the 50 shades books & I had to force myself to finish all 3. The writing is awful, the characters are shallow & the story is unrealistic & somewhat predictable in every way. Not interested in the movie at all. Yes, it's fantasy romance but it didn't inspire me so much as it bored me.
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