dandylion

Lexie...I think that most of us realize that we are writing pretty casually, here..and, sometimes rapidly. Sort of like informal conversation among friends.
I know that I make mistakes all of the time. However, I don't think it matters much (to others). Sometimes, I knowingly use a style that is not "correct", and, would, surely get me beheaded by an English professor....but, I deliberately do it to sound more user friendly to the target audience. More conversational....

dandylion

***plus, my spell check has been broken, forever....

Carlotta

English is not my first language so I m just glad I get to communicate with all of you and don't worry Lexie: This is not about 50 shades of grammar

LexieCat

LOL, thanks, guys, I often read over my posts and catch something like that, and I even edit for punctuation. This one I didn't notice till I was quoted.

I'm not hard on other people who make the same mistakes, but it irritates me when I do it because this is so much of what I do for a living (writing, that is).

No worries, I'm not in the depths of depression or anything. Just piqued (not to be confused with peaked).

Verte

A few summers ago it felt as if everywhere I turned there was a woman (young, old, in-between) with a copy of this book tucked under their arm or sticking out of a beach bag. The babysitter of my little girls was reading it at the time and said that her mother was as well. 'Sex' and 'my mother' rarely, if ever, come up in the same sentence in real life. Even through pregnancy and childbirth, how often is (was...times are changing) sex in the context of sexual activity discussed between moms and daughters?

Things have changed for me since becoming a mother. I am grateful for every living soul who teaches the beauty of life as they see it, helps to keep my girls' world safe and treats them with the respect of which we are all deserving. I am not naïve to reality. The cliché of being the change you want to see is totally appropriate when working toward a world where women genuinely feel valued, safe, empowered, capable of self-respect, loved and not just in their own heart and mind or under their own roof.

Originally I did not read the book because I could not imagine reading a sex-scene that my mother may have already read and processed [awkward pause]. Now I choose not read it because one person asked me not to and she need not ask twice.

Carlotta

It seems that we are not the only one discussing it, a friend of mine posted that comic on FB lol

torquemax777

I have not read the books nor will I see the movie. But I did find it slightly amusing that a resident at a nursing home; probably in her 70's was reading the book last year. She seemed pretty shocked, but also seemed to be enjoying the fact that she was reading it.

Fandy

I read all 3 books.....it was entertaining as my ankle was sprained and I needed to remain off my feet. I'm secure in that no one is going to take advantage of me and attempt to abuse me because of this.

I don't understand how so many can comment so strongly and start a thread about it if you haven't read it...????
it is fantasy, nothing more. I did not read any deep evil meaning into it. anymore than I did those romance novels I read many years ago. (the lip biting annoyed me too).

I would not recommend this for a younger set, but most people that will see it will see it for what it is, a simple common fantasy fairy tale. Not anymore realistic than Spiderman or Cinderella, I never found any "deep meaning" of abuse in it....I believe that the books mean to set Anastasia as the one with control FWIW.

I know this opinion is not popular, so I won't comment further, but as a woman who is a secure adult, I didn't find it any more damaging than the classic " Deep Throat". However, many years later, we find out that the actress was manipulated for that performance.

hopefully these actors were not.

KariSue

I agree. Thanks for commenting.

I am going to see the movie (when it gets at the $3 theater probably ). One reason is to see if the screenwriter's can actually improve on the writing! My ex daughter-in-law is seeing it tonight while I am watching my granddaughter so she can go see it. I am going to get her take on it.

There is an old movie that I also like with a similar bent called Secretary. It is a bit dark but after watching it the second time I really loved it. It stars James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhall.

Kari

pinkpeony

But, as you stated, you are a secure adult. Huge difference than the 17 & 18yo girls I know who are going to see it tonight. Huge.

Fandy

In my neighborhood, the book was chosen as part of a discussion book group, very popular with the young 30s mommies. These women are not little meek mousies, but the role playing got the discussion rolling and focused on excitement in their personal relationships. I am being delicate here.
there isnt a demon in the books, jmho.
I was a 17 year old girl who saw Deep Throat. Today, i can honestly say, the movie did not affect my life, or relationships in college, my career.

HealingWillCome

I have three teen/young adult daughters. Your point is exactly why I'm commenting so strongly. You make a legitimate point about judging without reading first, but I've heard enough from friends who have and I trust their judgment. I'm not concerned about myself or my healthy adult girlfriends who get the difference between fantasy and reality. It's my daughters I care about. I want to have open discussions with them about '50 Shades' and fantasy vs. reality, the glamorization of abuse, healthy sexuality, healthy relationships, control, manipulation, and codependency. I want to hear their interpretations of the books, the movie, and be able to answer their questions. Until I read the story or see the movie (when it's cheaper to go) I'll base my judgment on what I've heard from people I trust.

Fandy

Heresay...read the books.

auroraxborealis

You know, I was late on the bandwagon, but I finally watched Frozen a couple months ago. Still pretty raw, and probably oversensitive, but even that movie's message got to me.

"Love is putting someone else's needs before yours." Well, that never got me too far.

jaynie04

Fandy…do you know the story of Linda Lovelace's life? I read about her life in my teens, she was abused and made into a commodity. That affected me. After college,I worked on Wall St at a time when strip clubs could be expensed. Later, as one of the few women at a high level on a trading floor I had the ability to make an impression and set a tone. I believe I did that. I mentored women who appear on television daily, who are respected for their minds, who now discuss commodities rather than being treated as one.

I was impressionable in my younger years, and perhaps because I am a big reader I didn't accept things at face value. There is always a story behind what is presented. It is the same reason I can't go to circuses or zoos, there is a often a grim reality when the surface is scratched.

I have always been a strong proponent of women bolstering other women. Linda Lovelace was used and abused, I think that it would be hard to watch Deep Throat knowing that she was under duress.

alphaomega

I read them. Found them to be mildly entertaining. Mildly. Would I reread them ?

Not on my worst day.

Worried about it in the "mainstream" ? Considering that 30 percent of all internet searches are Porn based (and that number is probably GROSSLY understated) I well expect most 17 and 18 year olds (and sadly, probably much younger) have accidentally, (or not) tripped over some pretty horrifying things.

The kinds of things that you can't un-see.

I, myself, as an adult have been indelibly scarred by things I have stumbled over while researching things for the industry I am in.

The rubber industry.

No, not that kind. The INDUSTRIAL rubber industry. Seals, gaskets, washers.

I kid you not, I was horrified. And all I did was type in a few totally innocuous words while googling the competition.

The 50 shades thing is 9 1/2 weeks 2.0.

Weve got FAR bigger problems our babies are facing.

Right at their fingertips.

Verte

Exploitation. The capacity for humans to exploit other humans, with a special predilection for women, children and their bodies. No "Us vs Them" arguments of any kind were desired with my chime-in on this thread.

We know very little about each other. I'm just in my 10th month of sobriety and very well may be a tad more sensitive about certain things. If this book was mentioned in any other forum I would have posted the same about not wanting to read the same sex-scenes as my mother. How juvenile.

Despite not having read the book, I can assure you that my voice is actually quite valid as are each of ours. Despite having vastly different life experiences we coexist in the same society. I respect your experience and views.

I will say that when I was 14 years old in H.S. I was taunted by a group who told me that I had a mouth exactly like Linda Lovelace. That I must secretly be filming porn after school. ********. For an entire year I had to deal with this and had never watched Deep Throat or even heard of Linda Lovelace.

lillamy

This is the best commentary I've read. I haven't seen the movie and won't. The first book (which made Twilight read like Shakespeare) triggered me enough -- not interested in reading any more or seeing the movie.

HealingWillCome

Thanks for the link, Lillamy. Good read. Another to share with my daughter who has read the books.

DesertEyes

Pardon me for interrupting.

Because we are G-rated, and have children reading these posts on a regular basis, we can't have material, or _links_ to material, that is non-G rated. For that reason I removed the link that was posted a couple messages above.

If you all want to share links please do so via PM.

thanks

Mike,
Moderator, SR

Santa

Interesting that you mention Secretary @KariSue. I love me some James Spader but did not make it through the DVD, I was not enjoying it or it was causing me some stress, I'm not sure which.