equanamama

just curious, i have not tried al-anon but i feel that my meditation practice (over 25 year) has truly helped and there are so many cross-over points between them. it has helped me so much during the really explosive times to just keep cool, stay firm and then not get stuck in the story of what happened. okay i really did a lot of that but i can see progress over time (no meditation does not make you a saintly person!) my daughter just admitted a problem and i think she has been drinking since she was 13.

i just wanted to offer that as a new person to the group, i have been both sitting and studying for a long time and would love to have that conversation with others.

:meditate:

Jane11

Hi equa (I hope it's ok if I shorten and call you that) please let me know if not

I am really interested in what you have to say about meditation for a few reasons- I think of myself as quite a spiritual person and meditation has always interested me, I have also recently taken up yoga and was looking into meditation on the back of this to deal with the serious anxiety that I am going through from my relationship and the fall out of this leading to no contact.

I have started to read a book on mindfulness which has some 'exercises' that are similar to a premise of meditation I think (I stopped reading as it was something I tried to share with my ex and it now makes me sad) but I would like to start reading again

I would be most interested to discuss this topic with you and how you've found it has helped you- particularly as I can't get to Al anon as they are not accessible for me in my area.

I think maybe this could be something positive to discuss to take my mind from wondering to dark places (and might help others too), and would be interested to hear anything you have to say about the topic as you seem like a pro from the length of time you have been studying this.

I'm also sorry to hear about your daughter, and I am hoping that your meditation will help, this is a great place to talk freely though if that is what you need too.

sauerkraut

Hi equanamana,
Yes, I meditate too and find it very helpful. I'm a newbie who just started in the fall about the time I joined this group (and had recognized that I was stuck on an endless rollercoaster with my AH and had to find ways to get off). I'm not even very good at meditation, and yes, I know that the fact that I judge how well I meditate means that I'm not understanding the non-judgemental part of it . . . which means I'm not good at it yet

BUT just the practice of sitting quietly for ten minutes, trying to focus on my breathing, is so calming and helpful. I agree with you--it fits in well with the AlAnon mantra of focusing on yourself, on what you can do, to change your own mental state and therefore how you respond. I was inspired by the book "Beyond Addiction," which recommends meditation as a tool for building resilience. Now I've started an 8 week Tibetan meditation course and am so happy for how it's changing my life.

Thanks for starting this thread.

honeypig

Hi, equa (I think I'll shorten it too!)--here's a link to a thread you might like to look at: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...m-morning.html

I know we have other meditators here as well as folks who use yoga, daily readings, exercise, and many other forms of self-care. This thread http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...you-today.html was originally started in July and then was revived recently. I love this type of thing; it gives me so many great ideas about how to take care of myself in healthy ways. I hope you like it too.

Hammer

Supposed to be part of Step 11. But I am weak on the Meditation stuff. I sort of settled on whenever I find myself thinking about the A, I think about God, and God Stuff.

So in my case -- Substitution, I suppose, more than Meditation.

===========

Step 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

equanamama

Thank you all, and yes you can give me a shortened nick name.

i have been doing some peer leading in a local group for the last 2 years and work with a theravadan nun, however mostly talk about meditation in a secular way which i think is better, i am also leading 4 classrooms once a month in mindfulness exercises since i work in a school but not as a teacher. this has brought in another side, giving some limited guidance on meditation.

i would say that 10 minutes as many days as you can is awesome. be really gentle if there is some trauma or a lot of anxiety. Self compassion is really a big part of the process. Also sitting meditation is one form but there are others. when i returned from retreat and got the immediate drama i was not able to sit for over a week. Sometimes i went to the gym on the treadmill or walked. you can practice the same mindfulness if you are very intentional about it.

i saw the relatives section and that there is a spirituality section as well. So much to check out.

CodeJob

Welcome equanamama!

I started meditating last Lent. So I am a newbie in comparison to you. It has helped me a lot step off the crazy train. I have been jumping on the Oprah/Chopra free mediation series and really enjoy them.

ladyscribbler

I've been taking a mindfulness class at the VA for the past few months and building up a daily meditation practice. One of our local Alanon groups actually gets together about 20 or 30 minutes before their meeting time and does a group meditation.
My daily meditation has been very helpful to my healing. I would recommend it to anyone.
Thanks. Great post.

Stung

I'm a newbie to meditation as well and actually credit Codejob with getting me hooked on it. I've been using the app HeadSpace for the last couple of months and they have daily guided meditations that range from 2 minutes (they call those their SOS meditations, like I'm freaking out and I know meditation would help but I only have a few minutes) to much longer ones. I'm currently doing 20 minute meditations daily and it really has made me soooo aware of my breathing, physical reactions to stress and paying attention to whether I'm allowing my thoughts to run away on one subject.

I now encourage my young daughters to take big breaths when they throw temper tantrums and awesomely enough they listen, take big breaths and simmer down.

guava

There is a new one starting up soon..."We are delighted to announce our BRAND NEW 21-Day Meditation Experience, Manifesting True Success, starting March 16!" They are free.

I need to try listening in the morning this time. Last time I listened as I was getting ready for bed and every time I was asleep within 15 minutes. So calming. At that point in my life though I needed some restful sleep so it was really helpful in a way I didn't expect.

equanamama

stung, there are some great things for kids, a few books like peaceful piggy and moody cow meditates. i got sitting still like a frog which includes a cd of a lady with a really soothing voice. i think the longest one is 5 minutes on there and some exercises in the book that i am using with kids in school.

FireSprite

Thanks for the heads-up on the new 21-day series guava, I am now registered! I loved the last one & it really helped me to get into the habit.... enough that I can tell when I fall out of routine & don't meditate for too many days in a row.

Honeypig recently introduced me to Louise Hay & I've been listening to this meditation daily since Friday. I'm shooting for the 30 days as she suggests during the intro:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dcaCc3bIA8

DD started kid's meditation classes at about age 9 & it has made a world of difference in her stress management. (it's been close to 2 yrs at this point) She now creates her own meditations & has been leading the class in that exercise sometimes.

Stung

Thanks, Equana, I'm going to look for those books! My 3 year old LOVES yoga and does kids yoga a few times a week and my 18 month old loves anything that her big sister does so she tries to do it too. But they both started just doing yoga by watching me do it at home and when I meditate I do it when they're sleeping. LOL It's really the only time that I can have extended periods of quiet. I think a little guided children's mediation would be so beneficial for both of them. And me.