skylett

Let the court handle it not u and him. Good luck with a new start

sauerkraut

Hi lizatola,
I'm in a somewhat similar spot with my Ah. One place I found excellent free legal advice was by googling attorneys in my area. Many will meet with you once for a free consultation. The one I went to even suggested effective mediators in our area. You may be able to find both by checking yelp. Good luck, and good for you for taking steps forward.

LLLisa

It amuses him to see you dance around every time he changes the rules.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhLlXvkm65Y

Hawkeye13

Time to play some hard ball Liz.

He keeps jerking your chain, and you are still way too tempted to jump.

S#@%^ him and the poor horse he rode in on.

lizatola

Probably. And, that's why I think I'm the one who needs to move out first. If I'm not sitting on the couch next to him, I'm not as easy a target. Emails and text messages and phone calls are easier to ignore or can be addressed another day.

As others have said, I'm taking a HUGE risk by leaving first. He has control of the purse strings and our house is the only asset that has my name on it. I have a lot of things to do today: call a new mediator that was referred to me over the weekend. Call my lawyer and try to get some answers out of her without her demanding her fee or find a new lawyer for a consult at some point this week. Set up another bank account in my name with a local bank (I have one already but it's an online bank and I want something local, too). Box up some belongings, etc, etc....the list goes on.

We, again, discussed last night the idea of a lump sum payout for spousal support. He understands that child support will have to be paid monthly and cannot be paid in a lump sum.

My son is ready to move out. He seems baffled by how an alcoholic can go on a binge until 6 AM, sleep all day, be hungover, and then go about the following day like a normal person and pretend that nothing was wrong with their behavior. I think he's had enough of dad and it's time I stepped up to protect him even if it means I have to raid my retirement monies.

hopeful4

Liz, I think this last post all sounds very wise. I have no further advise, just wanting you to know I am here, reading this, cheering you on. One step at a time my friend!

XXX