maia1234

Kris, as tough as we are here, we all still love our A's. I can't be with mine anymore because I was going down a deep hole, faster then him. I chose to try and dig myself out. I have learned that I don't have to stop loving my A, i can love him from a distance. Just detach, No contact and see what happens. God works in mysterious ways!!

((((((hugs, things will get better))))))))))

kris101231

You are honestly the best. thank you for being so supportive and kind.

TerpGal

If I had a crystal ball, at 22 I wouldn't have been anywhere near my RAH. We started dating when I was 20 and he was 21 and in College. He wasn't a raging alcoholic yet......definitely binge drinking but then again so was I. We were both in the Greek system, it was college yadda yadda ya. It was fun, for a while.

Let me give you an idea, at your young age, what you are in store for if you let him back in. Over the years after we graduated, RAHs drinking grew more and more severe and so did his behavior. He was miserable and angry. It was always about something else. His job. Family stress from his mentally ill addict sister. You name it, anything other than him. A littleover 4 years in, we got engaged. His drinking had really ramped up and at times could be nasty and scary. I thought about calling off the engagement but didn't because so much money had already been shelled out and would be lost and I didn't want to make my parents mad. If I knew then what I know now........

It only got worse. He managed to hold down a job the whole time but was pretty much drunk every day. He was verbally abusive. Then physically abusive. He tried to force himself on me a couple times, but he was very drunk and uncoordinated so I was able to get away. I got very sick along with him. I suffered badly with depression and cutting as a teen and they came back full force. I attempted suicide 4 times. I thought about leaving but I never could. We have been together 13 years and alcohol has never NOT played a part in our relationship.

Thankfully my husband found recovery for himself, but I am too broken from this. I am getting ready to seperate from him for a while to get myself together.

THIS if not worse is going to be your future. I know 3 years together seems like a long time when you're 22, but is it worth a lifetime of misery. Breakups always hurt. They suck. Stay strong my young friend. You have your WHOLE life ahead of you. This is a loss. Allow yourself time to grieve it and move on. You deserve it.

charis78

Hahahaha sorry. I used to think I could go out for a coffr and make him see the light. Don't bother they don't want to hear it nor will they believe it. In fact mine became downright nasty. Let it go. Maybe if he gets his **** together he will come back. Until then you deserve better than an email written two weeks late and only BC someone got angry at him.