SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/)
-   Friends and Family of Alcoholics (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/)
-   -   ot book review-grandchildren of alcholics (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/357062-ot-book-review-grandchildren-alcholics.html)

cricket123 01-19-2015 09:09 PM

ot book review-grandchildren of alcholics
 
Grandchildren of alcoholics by Ann w Smith anyone read it?

I read a excerpt on it and it fits me too a t. My grandfather was an alcoholic and I think I can count on 1 hand how many times my mom talked about him.

Any opions on this book?

readerbaby71 01-19-2015 09:19 PM

It sounds interesting. My grandfather was also an alcoholic. He was very abusive to his children, but as a grandfather he was patient and kind. He also sat at the kitchen table drinking a shot and a beer and smoking camels all day. But he made me breakfast. My mom loved him. He was a very smart man, but haunted by demons he couldn't let go.

Stung 01-19-2015 09:39 PM

My mom is an ACoA and her dad was an alcoholic that was abusive and crude (neither of my parents are addicts). She's told me some stuff about him but mostly it was in a "you should consider yourself lucky, my dad used to [insert something totally abusive, like spank me with a giant ass paddle (my mom has the paddle, btw, I've been threatened with the damn thing myself)]" and then she would subsequently do something slightly less abusive and I was to consider myself lucky.

I remember when he passed away (I think I was around 10 years old) my mom inherited everything that he had and the car that she inherited was absolutely covered in cigarette ashes. Every single surface. It was disgusting. I didn't understand how something like that could happen, but knowing what I know about addiction now, I totally get it. He died from cirrhosis of the liver.

Catherine628 01-19-2015 11:12 PM

Thanks for posting this. My grandfather was an alcoholic too and had a horribly abusive upbringing. I remember going along to fetch grandpa from the bar so we could have Christmas dinner.

My mom rarely talks about her childhood and works very hard to create the perfect family she never had.

Smiley1 01-20-2015 06:27 AM

Both of my grandfathers were alcoholics. One was horribly abusive, mean, and just right downgrading to my mother, and the other abandoned his family, and left my father in the hands of my mentally ill grandmother. It is a miracle that neither one of my parents had addiction issues themselves. However, they did raise two good codependent children and in spite of their own upbringings, did everything in their power to make sure our childhood was nothing like theirs.

Just goes to show that there are very few degrees of separation when it comes to the impact upon families.

Bullfrog 01-20-2015 06:37 AM

It's excellent. Described my childhood to a tee.

cricket123 01-20-2015 07:48 AM

Here is the link to the excerpt if interested

LIFE, FAITH, POLITICS : Book Recommendation - Grandchildren of Alcoholics by Ann W. Smith

theuncertainty 01-21-2015 10:28 AM

Thanks for the link, Cricket123.

My maternal grandmother was an abusive alcoholic, but passed when my mother was quite little. My mom did talk to us about her. Not a lot, though. It was usually to explain things like why she couldn't hear with one ear, or where she'd gotten a scar. It was usually quite matter of fact. She didn't hide that her mom was an alcoholic, but it's just they way it was.

I haven't read the book, but may need to pick it up based on the excerpt. My maternal grandfather passed a few years after his wife, so Mom and her siblings were raised in a children's home (orphanage). It's so unnerving to see my family in parts of that excerpt when my grandmother's influence over my mother was over a relatively short period of her life. I think it speaks to just how much addictions in a family really affect even young kids.


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:13 AM.